Take Control of Your Life: Just Say NO

I am a 'people pleaser' by nature. Maybe that's why I need this bitchy blog to vent. We all can only take so much, right? Sometimes I can't grasp the simplest concepts -- just saying NO to unnecessary demands of my time. My friends and family have been telling me for years to just say NO to things. I always thought it was easier said than done. My reply was always, "I know, I know, but I need to attend/donate/volunteer because......"

Bullshit. You don't "need" to do anything. I only wish I had heeded the advice earlier in my life.

Once you begin to use the powerful "no" word, people will not like that you are no longer a doormat for their agenda. Who cares. Nobody has the right to fill up your calendar for you. Nobody has the right to extort money and time from you -- even if the word "charity" and " community volunteering" is used to disguise the extortion.

If you truly want to participate in something, then by all means, go for it. If it makes you feel stressed, than delete it from your thoughts permanently. You do not need to make excuses for not participating in anything. A simple, "No, thank you. This doesn't work for me right now." is all that is needed.

Do NOT allow people to bully you into submission or into offering detailed explanations as to why you're choosing not to do something. It's none of their business.

I've begun practicing this concept of saying "no" this year. I've said "no" to coordinating two major charity volunteer events that also involve my work. My choices were not well received, but then I could feel the anger arise inside of me because of what was simply expected of me to voluntarily give on top of my work responsibilities. The initial twinge of guilt quickly passed.

The reduced stress and the peace is well worth it.