The Dream of Dad

 My father died on Christmas Day.  It's been six months.  Last night I had my first very vivid dream of my father.  I saw him and he looked like he did in his prime.  I would guess between 30-50 years old.  He was donning his hunting beard.  In my dream I knew he was dead.  I saw him coming to me and I asked him, "Dad, how are you?"

He replied in his usual cowboy understated tone of, "No complaints."

I then asked if I could give him a hug.  Dad complied.  After the hug I went on to introduce him to my daughter's sixth grade teacher as it was the end of the year and we were cleaning out her locker.  

In the same dream I was explaining to two women about the untimely death of my cousin, Karey, who died in a car accident in 1983 in rural North Dakota.  I was telling them about her death, and the hair on my arms stood straight up.  I said, "She's here."  

Again, I woke up exhausted.  I slept, but I did not rest.  My dreams had other plans. 

Summer Solstice

Yes, I recognize the summer solstice with my soul (sol) sisters.  Last night it happened here at approximately 2:00 AM Pacific Daylight Time.  Is it possible to be Christian, pagan, wicca, Mussar, simultaneously?  I'm going to say YES.  

After the ritual I went to sleep.  It was late.  I had a dream about Natalie who was a childhood friend and she died recently.  In my dream I knew she was dead, but she was standing there talking to me.  I told her about all the things that remind me of her to this day.  I spent a lot of time at Natalie's house growing up.  She was very funny and we had a lot of inside jokes that nobody but us would ever understand.  I told her I was sad that I did not get to say goodbye before she passed.  She smiled.  

Also in the dream was my cousin, Karey, who died in a car accident when I was 16 and she was 15 .  Her spirit is troubled.  Life was cut short and she's resentful and rebellious. 

Free Money - NOT

 During the COVID pandemic when everybody was freaking out about the economy our printing presses were issuing money at breakneck speed.  Politicians had no idea how, where, what, the long-term effect would be.  All politicians wanted to do was shove money in people's pockets immediately and damn the long-term consequences. 

Here's the problem.  Politicians don't see anything long-term except getting re-elected and holding onto power.  Politicians will tell the people ANYTHING to get a vote not unlike a like a guy trying to get a girl into bed.  

Here's where I'm going.  All this funny money the government issued and distributed has all come home to roost in the form of skyrocketing inflation.  I called it a long time ago.  Of course, I was called an austere, salty beach.  LOL. (exiting soapbox)

On a lighter note, yes, we are all experiencing the pangs of inflation.  Our 10% raise sounded GREAT - until inflation swallowed it up like a frog with a June bug.  A raise is only a raise if everything else remains constant or prices move lower.  What people really want is not a raise, but rather increased purchasing power.  There's a big difference.  Purchasing power is a lot harder to manipulate and control than throwing money at problems and people. 

Here's a little ditty from one of my favorite UNDER rated bands.  It's called Low-Budget.  I think we all can relate in this inflationary environment.  

 

Empty Nester

My sister and niece just left and are heading back to Minnesota.  It's the first time in 34+ years my husband and I have not been responsible for kids.  I don't count the time when daughter was away at college as we were fiscally responsible for her, and still responsible upon her return after she graduated until she settled into a job.

Now what?  Whatever shall I do with myself?  Well, for this week I'm going to Walnut Creek with M and S to see a live musical on Wednesday.  The next day I have a spa treatment scheduled with my friend, K.  The coming weekend is full of dipping around the SonoMarin Fair people watching, bringing out my inner low-class-white-trash self, and listening to music.  There are also several graduation parties to attend. 

Me?  Bored?  NEVER!

It's official:  Both kids have graduated from college debt-free, both are married, and both are now OFF the payroll :) 

Whoooooooooppppeeeeeeeeeeee     

It's also the first time in decades we are NOT responsible for ANY PETS.  Sure, we have the neighborhood cats that come around looking for better food than they get at home (yes, I spoil them), but we know who their owners are and that they are not homeless or starving.  

Please, allow me to revel in my space of not being responsible for anybody.  I'm sure it will change soon enough as elders need more care and grand kids will be born.  

 

 

 

 

Footsteps and the Camera

 Whew.  It's been a week.  My daughter is now married and on her honeymoon.  My son graduated from UC Santa Cruz and at this very minute is in his ancestral homeland of Minnesota experiencing it from a tourist point of view rather than the obligation vacation with family. 

My sister and niece are here at the house visiting.  I've mentioned several times that everybody in our house at some point has experienced the confused Native Americans wondering about trying to make sense of our modern world.

Well, it happened twice today.  My sister and I were in the kitchen cleaning up breakfast dishes when she heard footsteps and called out thinking it was her daughter.  Nothing.  The look on her face was that of pure bewilderment.  She SWORE she heard footsteps heading toward us in the kitchen.  However, nobody was there.  We were the only ones in the house.  Everybody else was across the street yakking with our neighbors.  I just kind of shrugged and said that's par for the course here.  I don't think the Native American spirits are malevolent, they are just curious and confused.  

Later that same day my husband asked me who was at the front door as our Ring camera alerted that somebody was there with "person detected".  Well, we have had a wedding and the gifts have been arriving and our camera beeps an alert when a delivery person is on our front step along with a live video feed.  Well, nobody was there in the video feed.  He kept on pestering me to check the front door as the alert of person detected kept going off.....well, again....nobody was there....not even our favorite neighborhood cats. 

Ready or Not: Here it comes

 In less than one week I will have my son graduating from UC Santa Cruz and my daughter getting married.  

My sister and her daughter arrive tomorrow from Minnesota.  They are the only two relatives who are making the trek to California for the wedding.  Many of my Minnesota relatives are farmers/ranchers and this is their super busy time.  My cousin in North Dakota made his daughter get married in December or January or he said he would not pay for it nor participate as they pretty much work 16 hour days other months of the year.  I get why my farmer/rancher relatives are not coming.  It's a 4 hour trek to the Minneapolis airport, then it's a 4 hour flight to San Francisco, then it's driving north to Sonoma County, getting a hotel room, etc., etc., etc.  It's a lot.   Still, I'm a little sad that neither one of my brothers nor my mom are not coming.  

However, my soul sisters from high school are showing up in force.  There's a reason we've all been friends since before we can remember :)

Truth:  I'm looking forward to life after the wedding.  I'm looking forward to finally having an empty nest.  Sorry if that sounds selfish.  I've been running a boarding house for my kids, their friends, and their significant others for 34 years.  

Another Truth:  We don't get a break.  We go from taking care of kids to taking care of elderly relatives.  It's all part of the life cycle. 

The Last Time

 As a society we are so focused on firsts.  For every first, there will be a last.  Do you remember the last time you saw your grandpa before he died?  Do you remember the last diaper you ever changed before your kid was potty trained?  What about the last time you drove away from a place you lived when you moved?  

Do you remember the last kiss you had with an old flame before you broke up?  

For every end there is a new beginning.