Long story short, I am in the process of purchasing a commercial building that is in foreclosure. What a pile of bureaucratic garbage the entire process involves. Doesn't anybody give a straight-forward deal anymore without some contingent-inspection-user-permit-environmental-impact-plugged-up-toilet-structural-integrity-gasp-gasp-gasp.....
No wonder we are in gridlock with everything. Our entire nation has been left to our lawyers to negotiate. Who thinks of the trite issues to even argue about? The banks want to dazzle and confuse you with their ever changing, complicated financing formulas. The real estate agents pretend to be working for you when in reality they are only thinking of jacking up the sale price to increase their take. The city and the county step in with their useless permit/zoning process that is an entire waste of time and money.
My needs are simple. I have a 3/4 million dollars cold, hard cash for a down payment. No contingency bullshit on my end. I want a building for a little more than a million. Give me straight talk. Give me a simple loan with a fixed interest rate and no mumbo jumbo. I will pay it. My impeccable credit speaks for itself. Stop all the useless jargon and involving lawyers chiming in on where to place the postage stamp for the application submission. Quit coming at me with your make-yourself-needlessly-complicated reports that don't mean jack, but you will be charged an obnoxious amount.
I'm to the point where I will say FUCK IT and put the money in my mattress rather than tangle it up with all you assholes.
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