What Republicans Are Doing Wrong

1.  Gawd.... they are sooooooo white and dorky;
2.  They are men, white, and dorky;
3.  They are white, dorky, men;
4.  They are dorky, OLD, white men;
5.  They wear suits.  Nobody wears suits unless you're a slick Wall Street scumbag trying to swindle;
6.  Get a cool hair cut.  The comb over is so.... well.... OVER.  
7.  Their wives are submissive baby factories not allowed to think for themselves;
8.  Ditch the Bible quotes and Christian right-wing nut jobs.  You could attract moderates if you did not grovel to that retarded voting base;
9.  Stop driving Dodge mini-vans with WWJD stickers on the back and your stupid-ass stick family decals on the rear window.  
10.  Do you have a political satire show that's actually intellectual and FUNNY?
11.  REMOVE STICK FROM ASS!

Legitimate Rape and Retroactive Retirement

Keep talking, republicans....  your true stripes show when you're away from your campaign script writers posing your every word and appearance.  I can't believe you think the American people so dumb not to see through your bullshit. 

Todd Akin's words regarding abortion,  “If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down,” he said, defending his absolute opposition to abortion, even in cases of rape.

Akin's professed expertise in the area of rape and female bodies is that he fathered two daughters.  Wow, do I feel sorry for them.

The two biggest oxymoron statements thus far in the campaign 'legitimate rape' and my Mitt Romney favorite 'retroactive retirement.'  The republican Beavis and Butthead campaign is downright humorous and entertaining at this point.   You never know what idiodic thing they're going to say next that will make anybody with functioning brain cells fall to ROFLAO.

Still, abortion and other social issues are used as a deterrent so we don't focus on what the parties are doing collectively to better the American people.  It's easy to be a democrat or republican these days and have a glowing track record.  All you have to do is blame the other party for not getting what you want through.  It's a win-win for the political pigs.  In the meantime they are padding their own pockets through their own salary and retirement benefits.