This is difficult for me to write. I found out that my first serious boyfriend (and the one I lost my virginity to) died over the weekend. I don't know any other details of the death as of yet. The weird thing was that I had a dream about him on Friday night. In the dream he kept on wanting to get back together with me, but I did not want to. He kept rubbing my back like he used to do when we were together. In my dream I thought that was going too far as I'm married to somebody else. He then was holding a baby girl that seemed to be about 6-9 months old. She was our daughter???? She had the big, blue eyes ex-boyfriend had. He took her away from me because he I would not get back together with him. The whole dream was weird, and I told my husband about it when I woke up in the morning.
The first thing I said was, "Why on earth would I dream about HIM?"
He was a big chapter in my life. We had a very tumultuous relationship that lasted 3.5 years. That is a long time when you're 16 - 19 years old. I can honestly say he was a mistake, but for whatever reason I needed to learn something from him.
I did not keep in contact with him after we broke up. I know he wanted to keep in contact. I never knew if I would bump into him in Nordeast when I was visiting my family and friends in Minnesota.
I guess where I'm going with this is that I'm emotional about his death, and I don't know why. He was not a "good guy." Death is just so final. The universe has deemed that no other lessens are to be learned during this incarnation for us. Our karma is complete for this lifetime.
Warning to Ex-Boyfriend: I won't forget our relationship and what you put me through. Plan your next life accordingly. I'll be waiting - it's your turn to be on the suckie end of things next time. LOL.
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