Frontier Pioneer

I guess my family has always been on the forefront of things whether it's by choice or not.  They carved civilization making the way west out the wilderness as American pioneers since 150 years before the American Revolution.  Yup, they are a bunch of hardworking, tough bastards who are not afraid of rolling up their sleeves and getting dirty to get the job done. 

Me?  I'm a wimp but I still find myself at the forefront of things -- although not necessarily out in the wilderness.  I was the first woman in my organization in a historically male position.  I was the first one to set up a home office with internet and a fax (this was pre-wireless days and had the now antiquated duck quack telephone sound connection).  I was the first one to "blend" family and career by showing up to meetings with a sleeping baby in a car seat way before it was "hip" to do so. Now I'm at the forefront of ACA implementation and the California Sick Pay mandate and responsible for setting company-wide policy on such.

I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS!!!!!!!!  I don't go out looking for implementing and administrating sweeping changes in social policy.  IT FINDS ME!!!!!!!!!!!!  God knows I try hiding in my office hoping that somebody smarter than myself with more energy takes the reigns and plows through all of this.  I'm not smart enough to see this through.  I'm really an idiot.  There are so many moving parts to coordinate that I get headaches just thinking about it.  WHY ME????