More Graduation Etiquette

While I'm on the subject of etiquette for graduation ceremonies, yet more thoughts for promoting polite behavior for the graduates AND their families.  Follow closely...

1.  I've already gone over the tortilla tossing, beach ball volleying, and donning ridiculous hats at the graduation ceremony.  Save the cries of "it's our graduation and we will do as we please."  Perhaps such juvenile behavior is condoned in your own household and immediate social circle, but what about the graduates who take this ceremony seriously?  Would you want those in attendance at your wedding to act like it's a frat party? 

2.  This is not the time for individuality.  Usually regalia is prescribed by the educational establishment hosting the ceremony.  Your graduating "class" really is a class.  We all know the number 20 was your number throughout high school football.  Nothing about your sports career, military career, or whatever else is to be showcased here.  It's about the academic graduation from the institution you are receiving your diploma from.  Period. 

3.  Those in the audience witnessing the ceremony need to show some basic manners as well.  Nothing is more irritating than those families who are there only until their graduate walks across the stage and then decide to leave.  No, we don't want your asses in our faces as you make your clumsy exit stepping on everybody trying to get to the aisle.  While your ass was in our face, we missed our own graduate receiving diploma.  Grandpa Walter came from Florida for this special event.  Somehow your fat ass in his face as you make your rude exit got in the way of seeing his grandson graduate.

4.  Not only was your fat ass in Grandpa Walter's face upon making your ill-timed exit, his hearing aid exploded because of the stupid blow horn you used when your graduate walked across the stage.  We'd like to return the favor using one of your own orifices. 

5.  Lastly, if you think the graduation ceremony is a boring joke, please do us all a favor and don't attend.  This is an event for grown-ups. Show your class that you have class.