Want to keep your adult children from boomeranging home back and forth between jobs, girlfriends/boyfriends, room mate "issues" and the like? Want them to grow up and deal with it? Are you sick of them coming home and eating all your groceries, drinking all of your beer, and leaving you nothing but piles of laundry and miss-piss toilet bathroom cleaning?
Simple solution. Walk around your home naked.
I guarantee they will not want to be home any longer. They will find other living arrangements immediately - even if they are sleeping in their cars. What can your adult children (who are supposed to be out on their own) really say? That you're not allowed to walk around naked in your own home?
HERE'S TO POWER AND FREEDOM FOR EMPTY NESTERS!!!
Showing posts with label empty nest. Show all posts
Showing posts with label empty nest. Show all posts
Friday, August 16, 2013
Thursday, May 23, 2013
On Life Milestones: Next?
The past 25 years have been devoted to my kids. Damn, that's a quarter century. People who have been convicted of murder have had prison sentences less than that.
Things are about to shift. If I think about it too much I will cry. It's all becoming a reality. The out-of-state relatives are arriving, final ceremonial touches are being completed, etc.
Now what? I thought I would be arranging babysitting, changing diapers, and wrestling with car seats and strollers for all eternity -- not to mention driving on just about every school field trip, making food for class parties, etc.
I've poured so much of my energy into the kids...... I guess I can finally learn that foreign language, upgrade my computer skills, and pursue other interests that have been on the back burner for 25+ years. That's the positive side of having kids when young. I still have a lot of time to enjoy traveling and such. My career is solid, finances are solid, and health is solid. Granted, it could all change on a dime as we never know what life holds for us, but all in all it's pretty darn good.
Things are about to shift. If I think about it too much I will cry. It's all becoming a reality. The out-of-state relatives are arriving, final ceremonial touches are being completed, etc.
Now what? I thought I would be arranging babysitting, changing diapers, and wrestling with car seats and strollers for all eternity -- not to mention driving on just about every school field trip, making food for class parties, etc.
I've poured so much of my energy into the kids...... I guess I can finally learn that foreign language, upgrade my computer skills, and pursue other interests that have been on the back burner for 25+ years. That's the positive side of having kids when young. I still have a lot of time to enjoy traveling and such. My career is solid, finances are solid, and health is solid. Granted, it could all change on a dime as we never know what life holds for us, but all in all it's pretty darn good.
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Separation and Growing Pains
I'm at a crossroads in my life. My kids are just about grown and now I have to figure out what I'm going to do with the rest of my life. I'm still young. Shall I delve into the business world? No, I've seen the devils in business suits. Shall I delve into politics? No, I prefer my bullshit fresh and steaming so I can at least put firecrackers in it like a birthday cake and watch it blow up. Midwest entertainment...For real.
What does that leave me with? I'm too cynical for religion, and I'm too softhearted to be agnostic.
What does that leave me with? I'm too cynical for religion, and I'm too softhearted to be agnostic.
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