Covid in China

The genie is out of the bottle, folks, and there ain't no puttin' it back in.  

I'm referring to COVID and our lame attempts to try to stop the spread of the virus through restrictions including providing proof of vaccination or a negative test for traveling or attending large gatherings.

 Here's the kicker:  None of this will work.

The virus is most contagious before the carrier even knows the virus is in their system.  Case point:  I was feeling the sniffles and took a test.  It came back negative.  A couple days later I was positive.  My scenario is not rare.  So many people feel a little crumby, take a test, and the result is negative.  A day or so later they test again and they are positive.  During that time they are grocery shopping, at the gym, going to parties, thinking they have a little cold.  Oh, and dare I say flying on planes. 

I have been vaccinated five times.  I still got caught the virus.  Granted, it did not land me in the hospital probably because I did have the vaccinations, but I caught the virus just the same.  

Imagine this scenario playing out across international travel.  Providing a negative test means nothing.  The virus could be incubating.  

The only way to stop the virus from mutating and spreading would involve the entire world to shut down.  That ain't gonna happen.  People always put their own needs first.  

The only thing we can do at this point is to mask up.  Spoiler alert:  The virus is mutating faster than the vaccines can keep pace.  Expect to catch the virus multiple times - like the cold and the flu - it is here to stay.

When the virus first came out three years ago, I mentioned that the world was going to have to deal with it forever as viruses mutate.  I was accused of being a downer.  

Sorry if I don't blow sunshine up your corn-holio.  People can't handle the truth. 

 

Where Did Christmas Go?

 Ever since before Labor Day we have been bombarded with Christmas hoopla at Costco.  It was especially disturbing to see Halloween, Thanksgiving, AND Christmas decor all at once.  Here is what I find strange.  Last week we made the trip to Costco to garner up food stuffs for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.  This was December 22.  

What was shocking to me was upon entering Costco there was no sign of Christmas anywhere.  No trees, no wrapping paper, no home decor, no candy canes,  nothing.  What is going on?  No sign of Christmas just a couple of days before the big holiday?  Why are we subject to Christmas at Labor Day and not during the actual season?  

On Christmas Day I was tuning into the yule log channel (yes, there is such a thing) and a commercial came on that stated, "Now that the holidays are over......"

Wait.  It's Christmas Day.  We are smack dab in the middle of the holidays.  

We are so busy hyping the holiday that when it's here nobody is actually enjoying the moment.  

So yes, the war on Christmas is a real thing.   Halloween and Thanksgiving are leading the charge.  Labor Day is blowing the bugle. 

Earthquake!!!

 Well, I blogged yesterday about my nephew and his bride wanting to shake down money trees to fund their wedding months after the fact.  

Truth is stranger than fiction.  Trees were shaking, buildings were shaking, everything was shaking.  Sadly, the shaking of trees did not yield any money.  There was an earthquake up near where they live in Eureka that caused extensive damage.  They are now without power and their walls in their apartment have significant cracks.

I will be extra nice to them on Christmas taking into consideration what they are going through, as I have a feeling they will be here early because of their lack of electricity.  Living without electricity gets old very quickly. 

Christmas Cards

 Believe it or not, after a hiatus of several years, I'm sending out Christmas cards this year.  I have them all addressed and ready to be dropped off at the post office tomorrow.  Why did I stop sending cards?  I suppose because for a while social media took the place of sending something snail mail.  Since I don't post anything on social media, I figured I would send something via snail mail to let people know I think of them despite not seeing them on a daily basis.  It's amazing how many people have touched my life and I don't think they realize it.  

On the snarky side of Christmas cards, I got one from Bridezilla who married my nephew back in early October.  That was the Eureka wedding reception where we drove 4 hours each way through Sasquach Territory.  We gave my nephew and Bridezilla a handsome gift for their wedding despite my reservations.  Personally, my nephew can do better and I think Bridezilla is an opportunistic gold digger.  I bit my tongue, swallowed my thoughts, attended the wedding reception in Eureka, smiled, and wished them well.  

Duty done.  We attended their Eureka reception, participated, chatted, smiled, mingled, gave a generous gift, etc., etc., etc.  What more is to be expected? 

Well, according to Bridezilla duty is NOT done.   We got a Christmas card in the mail that had two skeletal hands that were joined together with the slogan, "'Till death do us part, The Rumplestiltskins."

Rumplestiltskin is HER last name.  Damn.  My nephew did end up changing HIS last name to HERS.  

The card had pictures of them along with a long monologue of how they "eloped" earlier in the year, but had a reception afterwards and how happy they were.  Great.  Wonderful.  Yipee.  Blow horns and throw confetti.  However, the card went on as to how they want people to continue to contribute to their GoFundMe wedding site. 

Really?  Still begging for wedding money?  Begging has taken on such unseemly angles these days disguised as a Christmas card greeting. 

Well, I did send them a Christmas card.  Nothing else.  Rumor has it they will both be here Christmas Eve and Christmas morning.  I will welcome them in my house and gladly feed them...and I WILL be happy to see them.  However, if they are looking for a money tree, they will have to go somewhere else to shake it down.  

All My Boys Are Gurleys

It's the 81st Anniversary of Pearl Harbor.   I write this in memory of J.H. Gurley, who was on the USS Arizona December 7, 1941, when the Japanese attacked Pearl Harbor in Honolulu, Hawaii, and died.

Who was J.H. Gurley? 

Years ago, when my husband's Aunt Gertrude was still alive, she would tell us stories about that fateful day of December 7, 1941.  Aunt Gertrude knew the Gurley Family when she lived in Nebraska.  The Gurley Family was a farming family who lived outside of Omaha.  From what I remember, the Gurley Family consisted of five kids - all boys.  Mrs. Gurley would tell people, "All my boys are Gurley's."

Aunt Gertrude was very adamant that when we went to the USS Arizona Memorial back in 1992 we pay respect to J.H. Gurley as his name was on the wall.  Back in 1992 there was no internet or anything to piece together Aunt Gurtrude's recollection to the Gurley Family and even if his name was really on the wall.  Aunt Gertrude did not lie.  His name was listed just like she said it would be. 

It seems fitting to honor J.H. Gurley on the anniversary of the bombing in Pearl Harbor.  

Help! I can't taste nor smell!

 A symptom of COVID is losing the ability to taste and smell.  Everything was OK until last night while making dinner.  Granted, I don't have a lot of energy these days.  I went to make an easy but hearty black bean and pablano chili to help us with our COVID congestion and loosen things up a bit.  

I went for healthy, spicy, flavorful, and easy.  It's something the doctor would be approve of you eating along with all hairy-armpit, vegan fascists. 

Sigh.  I digress.

Anyway, I was making my black bean pablano chili and, like all cooks do, I taste to "see what else it needs" as far as seasonings.  Hmmmmm.... could use a little more spice.  Add spice.  Stir.  Simmer another 10 minutes.  Taste.  Hmmmmmmm....could use a little more spice.  Add spice.  Stir.  Simmer another 10 minutes.  Rinse and repeat.  

At that point hubby comes into the kitchen wondering when dinner will be ready.  I told him that I just can't get the seasoning right on the chili.  He tasted it and I thought fire was going to come out his mouth like a dragon from Games of Thrones. 

I have no idea when my sense of taste and smell will return.  All I can say is that it completely sucks the joy out of cooking AND eating. 

Guess What????

Look!!!!  I'm pregnant!!!!  NOT!!!!  After dodging the virus for nearly three years, it finally caught up with me.  I had my updated COVID booster shot the Tuesday before Thanksgiving.  The following day I felt kind of meh.  I still prepped food Wednesday despite feeling a bit off from the booster shot.  Thursday (Thanksgiving) was when I was exposed.  I did not have the vaccine in my system long enough to ward it off.  

The night before Thanksgiving is a notorious for Sonoma County going to the bars as everybody is home.  It's like a huge multi-generational class reunion of sorts.  Both my adult kids, and their spouses, were out mingling at the bars and came in at 2:00 AM.  The virus hitched a ride home with them as well at the end of the night.  

Thanksgiving was a houseful as always.  I would not have it any other way.  My son and his husband brought along a couple of strays for dinner.  My son-in-law also brought in a couple of his friends who were home from out of town for dinner (neither one of the friends wanted to have dinner with their own family - long story).  

The turkey was perfect thanks to a special brine recipe and a smoker that was followed with a low-temperature roast.  Thank you JT for the recipe!  The green bean casserole was also extra good this year for whatever reason.  All of the other traditional sides turned out as well.  The bonus was that my daughter baked a perfect pecan pie, apple pie, and pumpkin pie courtesy of the instruction of her mother-in-law.  My daughter's mother-in-law is a Southern Belle (as in Scarlett from Gone With the Wind) and nobody can bake pies quite like they can.    I don't even really like pumpkin pie and the one my daughter baked was delicious.  

After dinner we sat around the table and laughed, played games, told stories, and poked fun at each other.  Wine was flowing freely.  Nobody wanted to leave. 

The next morning I served breakfast burritos.  Nobody leaves my house hungry.  That's my mission and life purpose. 

Now.....getting back to COVID.  It was Saturday night when my daughter kept saying she was not feeling quite right.  The next day she tested positive for COVID, and it's been like falling dominoes with everybody who was at our house for Thanksgiving since.  

Nickle and Diming: Streaming Services

 We already pay a fee for internet at home and for television.  We also have a subscription to Netflix and a couple of other streaming services.  Here's what I don't understand.  It seems no matter what we want to watch, there is a "supplemental fee" or yet another subscription needed.  

It seems no matter what your internet entertainment package is, it will never be enough.  You will always be bombarded with, "This will cost you an extra $2.99 per episode despite the fact that you are already a paying subscriber."

I'm sick of being nicked and dimed to death.  Nope.  I won't do it.  There are plenty of classic movies and whatnot that are still part of the basic internet package that are obnoxiously priced that I'm already paying for.  

We do have alternatives, folks.  We are not captive to screen pirates who hold us hostage and demand we need to pay over and over  again and again.  For God's sake, books from the library are still free.  AND....I may learn a thing or two.  In fact, there are movies available for streaming from your public library....and music.  

Did I just save you a few bucks?  I hope so.  You're welcome. 

Happy Thanksgiving!

 I hope you all had a ball on Thanksgiving.  It's my favorite holiday.  How were things here in Sonoma County you ask?  Things were as nutty as always.  

More Do As I Say And Not As I Do: Newsom

 I found it ironic in the Sunday paper when Newsom, as Governor of California, has not released funding to cities for homelessness.  His catch?  He says that we (meaning local cities) all need to do better at the local level.  

Well, how exactly does that happen?  Newsom, you were Mayor of San Francisco and you could not help the homeless problem.  Now you are governor and you're demanding localities to solve a problem that you yourself could not solve....and now holding funding over heads for compliance.   

Wow.  What a chicken s*** way out.  Blame those lower on the ladder rung for an impossible task and control funding in the process.  

Sorry, I have no respect for somebody who demands an outcome they could not produce themselves.  

August 14, 1983

 I did not remember August 14, 1983 until a few days ago.  Out of the blue, my cousin in North Dakota sent me the inside of a wooden drawer I wrote all over.  The pencil writing is faded and difficult to read.  I had to employ a magnifying glass and bright light to decipher it.  

There it was.  My own writing.  1983.  I was writing to cousin Karey, who was the sister of the cousin who sent me the wooden drawer, about anything and everything that came to my then teenage mind.  I wrote about missing 4-H camp that year, but did not miss the rats and insects.  I wrote about her boyfriend, my boyfriend, parties we went to and the ones we were planning on going to.  The verbiage was peppered with early 1980's Valley Girl slang.  

What struck me the most was that I wrote how Karey drove like a maniac and called her out on it.  I was then struck by the date I wrote it - August 14, 1983.  It then dawned on my that was the last time I saw Karey alive as she died less than two months later in a single car accident in rural North Dakota. 

Trump 2024

 Really?  He's running again in 2024?  Does he not realize his show has been cancelled?  Well, when your ego is bigger than your brain that is what tends to happen.  

I understand why he was president.  I understand that people felt he was the only option other than corrupt, self-serving, career politicians ingrained in "the system."  

It's time to step aside, Orange Cheeto.  

Twitter

 My son had a saying for Twitter years ago.  He said, "Twitter is for on the shitter."

So true.  It's toilet reading at best.  I don't have a twitter account and I've never been a user.  The current upheaval at the company impacts my life....zero.  All of social media could disappear and my life would be impacted.....zero.  

I have an observation on the whole Twitter drama du jour.  I could be wrong, and I often am.  

Elon Musk was forced to purchase a company he did not want.  It's in his best interest to gut it and have it tank.  He will then claim the loss on his taxes, which benefits Musk.  Musk wins.  The sad thing is that it's a round-about subsidy to Musk at taxpayer expense. 

Expert Witness

I've added another title to my job description:  Expert Witness.

I've been at my job for almost 35 years.  That's unheard of in this day and age.  With that being stated, I've come to know many of the people I work with very well along with their families.  

Here's the backstory.  One of the guys I worked with owned his own company.  He and his wife left the business to their son, who had worked for the company all his life (don't get me started on child labor laws).  These wishes were stated in a trust that was prepared by an attorney.  

The dad died about 13 years ago.  The son has been operating the business per the directive of the trust.  Sister is stewing over the trust arrangement that son gets the business.  The mother gets dementia.  Sister gets mother to change the trust.  Son is suddenly out.  

It's an ugly legal battle and the son is trying to establish what he would have accumulated in his pension account had he gone to work for somebody else in a similar position in a similar company.  

I'm the person they want to retain as an expert witness.  I am NOT an actuary, nor a professional money manager/retirement planner and I was very up front about that.  Still, they want to retain me as a witness.  I'm very comfortable giving very approximate estimates that anybody with a 9th grade education could figure out......and they want to pay me for that?  I guess I have credibility.  Thank God, cuz I don't have much else. 

Veggie Chili and Corn Bread

 What is that falling from the sky?  Could it be rain?  After months of warm sunshine we are experiencing our first taste of winter.  Lord knows we need the rain.  People are walking around outside looking up to the sky in disbelief like geese getting their faces and nostrils wet.  Let us hope that people are smarter than geese and will come in out of the rain should the rain get into their nostrils and drown.  

Somehow, I don't think humanity is that smart.

It's soup and chili season.  Today I'm making my famous veggie chili and cornbread.  The vegetables are all from the garden, which makes it extra gooooooooood.  The cornbread is baked in the same 150 year old cast iron skillet that made the prairie trip west.  

Food is such a great distraction from the political vitriol that is rampant this election season.  I can't bear to watch the news nor read the newspaper any more as the media only fans the flames of the us vs. them mentality.  Truth = Both sides are corrupt AF.  The media is denouncing violence against politicians.  They don't see their hand in perpetuating it.  They love the ratings when people tune into the latest shocking event, but hate the impact of same event perpetuating even more shocking events.  Sorry, media, you can't have it both ways.  

Yes, we are experiencing a flash point in our nation's history.  However, tell me of a revolution that was borne without violence.  

Pelosi Beaten

 No, I'm not referring to a voting outcome.  I'm referring to Nancy Pelosi's husband getting beaten in their home.  I'm sure just writing this will get me tracked by government intel and the Google police.  Of course, dems are trying to pin republicans as the source of all evil.  It's more complicated than that.  What people are pissed about is the layers-deep, generations-deep corruption along with hypocritical, self-serving politicians who smile at you while they are screwing you over.  The outlet for this frustration was bound to happen one way or another.  

Just look at California.  We have the same handful of families that have had a stranglehold on politics for decades.  Nobody wants to talk about it as Pelosi and Newsom are involved.  The mainstream media does a great job of hushing that fact.  One has to hunt for such information that is truth, but ignored.  It gives credence to those who also wonder what else is being hidden and gives merit to off-the-wall websites and blogs.  

The harsh truth is that the government brought on all this hate and distrust themselves with their own egos, greed, and hunger for power. 

Austin, Texas

Travel with my work is in full swing again after the COVID hiatus.  Friday we are leaving for Austin, Texas for the national convention.  I've heard that Austin is San Francisco, Jr. and that the rest of Texas considers Austin part of California (which they hate).  Texas has an all out aversion to anybody and anything from California.  How could we blame the Texans? 

I will not advertise where I am from.  I just want to check it out, blend in with the crowd, listen to music, dance, eat, and dance some more.  I'm not out to change anybody's political philosophy. 

Hey, I will probably run into half of my neighborhood that moved to Austin from Sonoma County to escape California.  Little do they know that they brought the CA problems with them when they left.  

Wherever you go, you will always be there....your problems (and the societal problems) you thought you were running from follow you.  You bring it with you. 

Skoal! 

October 11, 1983

It's been 39 years.  It feels like an eternity ago, but it also feels just like yesterday.  I went to the Catholic church to do my annual lighting of the candle near the statue of Mother Mary in remembrance of Karey.  The doors to the church were locked.  I've never encountered locked church doors before.  I suppose crime and homelessness play a part in the church needing to tighten up.  OR the priests saw me coming and said to themselves, "Heathen alert! Heathen alert!  This is not a drill!  Lock all doors immediately!"

Sonoma County has changed.  A couple weeks ago there was a homeless guy sleeping outside my office door in the hallway.  

39 Years Ago

 I just got a random text from my daughter.  She said that she knows I carry trauma from my cousin, Karey, dying in a car accident.  Karey was like my twin sister (I was the dark one, she was the blonde LOL).  What my daughter did not realize was that it will be exactly 39 years ago tomorrow since her untimely death at age 15 in rural North Dakota.  I will never forget that day.  It was October 11, 1983. 

My daughter carries my anxiety about people dying in car accidents.  She is feeling that anxiety very strongly right now.  

I unconsciously passed my trauma down to my daughter.  

Here's my message to Karey:  Sorry your life got cut short.  I had plans of moving to the Fargo area and attending NDSU (Go Bison) after graduating from high school so we could go through college together and have a BLAST - like we always did with everything.  Wow.  Did my life ever turn out unexpectedly.  After you died, I went into a deep depression.   I wandered aimlessly around trying to make sense of things.  I made some bad choices with guys. I made some bad choices with jobs.  The only area where I did not make bad choices was my core friend group.  It's been 40+ years and all of us are still tight.  SSP, you were there through the bad, bad times. Fast forward to now and I'm living a life I never would have imagined - living in California?  Really?  Why??????  How did I end up in California?  It was not on my radar.  The point is, Karey, your life was cut short.  You were gone without warning.  The rest of us really miss you. 

Yosemite

 I've been in California for 37 years and never been to Yosemite.  My husband was born and raised in California and has never been to Yosemite, either.  My husband was born at a San Francisco hospital and has never walked across the Golden Gate Bridge (that's something tourists do).  I don't know who is more pathetic.  

I had a work meeting at the Rush Creek Lodge.  Finally.  We get to check out Yosemite.  It did not disappoint.  I only wish I had the entire week to spend there.  Next time.

Here's what I sensed on the drive into the Yosemite area, and you will think I'm crazy (shocker).  I could hear the trees crying for lack of water.  Yes.  I will repeat that.  I could hear the trees crying for lack of water.  

Bridal Vail Falls was nothing but a sad trickle that dissipated into the air.  It reminded me of the construction guys peeing off the top of the Golden Gate Bridge.  Sure, things start off in a promising little gush; however, at that altitude it dries up before it hits the tourists down below.  Sigh.

I know you're sick of the cliche that pictures do not do Yosemite (or other natural environments) justice, but it's true.  Here's a pic off my iPhone.  The only ones who could possibly bring nature to life through their photography are my English friends JM and PM.  Sorry, I can't hold a candle to their photography skills.  

The Eureka non-Wedding

 My nephew got married to a salty beach a couple weekends ago in San Martin (which is just south of San Jose, California).  My son and his husband stood up for my nephew as his groomsmen.  I was honored for that.  The Salty Beach of a bride is a manipulative See-U-Next-Tuesday who is all about HER family and ignores and insults the groom's (my nephew's) family.

Salty Beach wanted the actual "real" wedding at an exclusive home they rented.  HER family was all invited to stay on the premises. There was a limit to the number of guests who could stay on the premises, so HER family stayed there.  My nephew's family had to make alternative arrangements despite his parents paying 75% of the cost.  

Here's the bottom line:  Groom (and his parents) were expected to shell out 75% of the cost despite being allotted 10% of the guest list.  Salty Beach did not even want my nephew's grandparents there.  Wow.  

I'm sure you're thinking, "Well, why did the groom and his parents just say no?"

Here's the reality.  They don't have the energy. 

The mother of the groom recently found out she was diagnosed with uterine cancer.  A hysterectomy was scheduled immediately.  

The sister of the groom is expecting the family's first grandchild.  The sister of the groom and her baby-daddy were NOT invited to the actual wedding NOR the reception that is to be held this weekend up in Eureka.  Why?  Because they are not vaccinated against COVID.  

Bullshit.

The REAL reason is that my niece (sister of the groom) sees right through the bullshit of Salty Beach and calls her out on it; therefore, sister of the groom MUST be punished as she sees through Salty Beach's pettiness.  Unfortunately, my nephew is to blame in this as well as he is p**** whipped.  HE is changing his last name to hers.  He never learned to stand up to this c-u-next-tuesday and saw her for what she is:  a divisive force tearing the family apart. 

Imagine the mother (and father) of the groom.  Here's her dilemma.  Their son (or should I say Salty Beach) wants to have the wedding reception up in Eureka, which is 4 hours north of Sonoma County, at the same time their daughter is due to give birth to the first grandchild.  

Sorry, but it's not exactly a straight drive from Eureka to Sonoma County.   It's a curvy road that is dangerous.  Cell service is sketchy should you need to call 911.  Finding a nearby hospital could prove daunting as the area is so remote.  I'm talking Sasquatch material here, folks.  Giant redwoods in remote areas with nothing for miles and miles.  

Daughter = due to give birth;

Son = married Salty Beach a couple weeks earlier at a private event for pretty much HER family and HAD to have their reception up in Eureka during the SAME time frame sister was due to give birth.  

Salty Beach wants to scrape in as much cash as they can for their wedding as they had their actual private event in San Martin.  Knowing that their limited guest list = limited gifts/cash for their limited guest list for the actual wedding, they scheduled a reception waaaaaaaaaaaaay up in northern California to extract as much as they can from friends/family without having to put forth much effort.  

They really don't want anybody to attend their "brunch extravaganza"  they just want everybody to fork over cash.  

Sorry, but I don't find driving 4 hours each way for eggs and toast for an event I was not worthy of witnessing originally worth it.  We were not worthy of the actual event, but now they want us to drive 4 hours each way for a "reception."  I wish they would have just called it as it is.......forget the reception invite all together and just fork over cash.  

Somehow, that was the plot all along.  They really don't want any of us to attend.  They just wanted to issue the invitation to justify asking for cash.  Imagine their surprise when we all show up sans $ eating their eggs and bacon. 

San Jose

 I spent the weekend in San Jose, California.  I know, San Francisco gets all the tourists' praise and glory.  However, I prefer going south the extra 40 miles or so from San Francisco to hang out in San Jose for a myriad of reasons.  For starters, my son lives there.  Yes, that makes me biased and I will own that 10,000% .  

I love the old architecture.  I love staying at the old Sainte Claire (now the downtown Westin San Jose).  At this point we know the staff at the hotel and they have shared their ghost stories and pics with us.  

I love the Haberdasher Bar.  It's an old speak easy that has a very 1920's vibe.  The drinks are really expensive, but just watching the bartender make them is worth the price.  

I loved that there was a heavy metal band in the middle of the street giving a concert.  Yes, it was all sanctioned as streets were properly blocked off with patrols.  There were random couches in the street as well.  People were bobbing their heads and getting into the music.  One old punker had a concert shirt from 1987.  YUP.... I can relate to that year....1987.  That was yesterday, right?  He had his spiked hair, spiked dog collar, and spiked everything else.  

Where I'm going with this was that the crowd was RIPE to move their head-bobbing to the music to actual dancing and I could feel the crowd's energy ready to bust open.   You know who excels at getting the crowd to dance?  Yup.  Moi.  Yes, it's me the old lady who unabashedly does some stupid dance moves is all that it takes.  Everybody else forgets their egos and joins in.  It's not a contest of skill and talent.  It's all about having fun.

Autumn Equinox

 It's official.  After today the nights will be longer than the days.  I celebrate the passing of the seasons with my coven.  We are a bunch of non-conformists who embrace Pagan ways.  However, we also embrace Christianity.  Yes, we are weird.  We may be weird, but we are harmless.  

I realized I have not been blogging much these days.  Somehow, I don't think that anybody cares.  Hey, I'm real about my non-importance.  If I died tomorrow my kids may or may not find my blog.  If they did and read it, they would say, "Wow.  Mom.  What a f***** b****."

What have I been doing lately?  Honestly, I've been busy canning onions, carrots, and tomatoes.  In between canning sessions I have been secretly saving the world.  LOL.  Seriously, my husband is an avid gardener and this time of year is harvest.  If I don't do something with the abundance of vegetables, they will rot and that would make me sad.  It would be a crime to let the organically grown vegetables go to waste.  Besides, canned organic tomatoes and canned onions make great Christmas gifts.  It's something that comes from the heart and home.  It's so much fun to see the face of the recipient as home-grown, canned tomato sauce fetches a pretty penny these days at the grocery store.  It's like we are giving them gold.  

Now that I'm all caught up on canning, this weekend we are taking a trek to San Jose to see my son and his husband as they invited us down for a BBQ.  We are staying at a hotel in downtown San Jose and on Sunday we are all going to see Cats (Broadway comes to San Jose). 

No, I'm not tipping any excitement scales.  However, I'm blessed with my kids and family.  Is being content a crime? 

The Dream of The Guy Who Knew Me

Last night I had a dream.  In the dream was a guy I did not know, but he knew me.  He called me by childhood nicknames.  He recited my complicated life situations verbatim.  I asked him how he knew all of that.  He said he was one of my guides.   Somehow we got on the topic of previous lifetimes and how I died in combat in some of them.  He then showed me what looked like movies of myself dying in combat in past life times over the ages.  It was gruesome.  

After seeing the past clips of myself dying that were met with "meh" from the universe, my guide told me that this was my lifetime to just enjoy, and that I had earned a break from war, misery, and death.  My mission in this lifetime is to enjoy.  

I'm having trouble accepting that.  There must be a catch, right? 

Fun Wedding

I recently returned from Minnesota back to California.  It's been a full-circle set of emotions from spreading dad's ashes to attending the wedding of SSP's daughter.  Wow.  Talk about a range from bummer to happy.  I guess that's life.  We embrace the suck along with the fun milestones.  

What I'm struggling with is the way my mother and siblings handled my dad's ashes with my father's side of the family, but I can't go into that now.  The five-words-or-less version is that I was the only one of my immediate family that went to the Lutheran Cemetery in Glenwood, MN with my aunt (dad's sister) to spread his ashes at the tombstone of his parents' grave (my grandparents).  

My aunt is a very strong woman.  I've never seen her cry despite her many, many life challenges.  She is also 81 years old and holds positions on several boards for community service.  She golfs daily and walks the course.  What I'm getting at is the woman is unstoppable.  She looks two decades younger and not in a Hollywood plastic kind of way.  She is beautiful, fit, smart, and sassy.  She will also be the first to tell you that you are full of BS and to bugger off.  I love her.

When we got to my grandparents' grave site and started to spread my dad's ashes my aunt fell apart.  I'm so glad she was not alone.  She sobbed on my shoulder for a long, long time while we stood there.  I did not want to dis my mother nor my siblings for not being there with my aunt, but I was secretly super pissed off that they did not come to the cemetery.  There is a long story there, but this was not the time to hold onto any past grievances with my father's family.  I thought it was a HUGE eff-you to my dad's family for my mom and siblings not to come to the cemetery.

I've rambled on enough about that.

The title of this post is "Fun Wedding."  SSP's daughter got married and we were invited to the wedding.  The bonus was that my Minnesota coven was also there, so it was like a reunion as well.  The wedding was held in a Catholic church near St. Cloud.  It's been a while since I've been to a Catholic wedding.  No, the walls did not fall in when I entered the church.  The service was very spiritual, which was something I was not expecting.  There was a moment when the priest had everybody raise their palms in the air and pray for the couple.  The energy was electric.  You could actually feel the buzz of energy being emanated.  I got goosebumps on my arms.  I shed tears of pure joy.  I was not the only one who felt it.  My Minnesota coven also felt the energy and spirit moving.  

The reception and dinner were held at a golf course.  After dinner we all went downstairs for dancing.  Nobody had to tell us to get on the floor.  We went out in force to the dance and stayed there all night.  Despite the social demands of being mother of the bride, SSP always made her way to us when she could.   There's a reason we have all remained friends for so many decades.

One image from the night that I will carry with me forever is seeing my friend, SYB, dance with her husband.  They are both really good dancers and when they are out on the floor together they are so fluid.  Each one anticipates the next move and it's so smooth like it's been rehearsed for hours, but it is not rehearsed -- they are just very comfortable in each other's arms.  It's so much fun to watch. 

Here's to SYB and her husband.  They rock each other like a wagon wheel.

Dad's Ashes

As I type this I am in my childhood home in Minnesota.  My dad's ashes are by the front door waiting for us to take them up north tomorrow to spread them by his deer stand, the farm where he grew up, and the cemetery where his parents are buried.   

So many emotions.  So many memories.  

Last night, when I arrived in Minnesota, my mother greeted my at the door stating that my father was here.  Yes.  I believe that.  His spirit is here in the house.  Her meaning was more literal.  She brought out a bag of ashes in a plastic bag and placed them on the picnic table outside where we were seated enjoying the warm August evening.  

"There's your father," my mother stated quasi-flatly as she placed his ashes down.  To her credit, I'm not sure how she thought she was supposed to feel in the moment.  Judging a widow is never a good practice.  We don't know what is going through her mind.  Grace prevails in situations like this. 

I wrapped my hands around the bag of ashes, closed my eyes, and wept.  His entire life, the ups and downs, the triumphs, and the defeats, all the arguments dad and I ever had, ultimately ended up as a bag of ashes on a picnic table. 

 I'm looking right now at his high school graduation picture, his Navy picture, his wedding picture.  Gone.  His life is just gone.  He is literally a pile of ash by the door. 

We all are awaiting the same fate.  Our egos just don't realize it yet.  We are all dust in the wind.  

Airline Travel

 Back in the day, airline travel used to be kind of fun.  Now it SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I dread making plans to fly anywhere - even if it's first class, which is what the coach experience used to be.  

September - November are my super busy travel months for work.  Covid gave me a respite for a couple of years.  Now the Covid excuse for not wanting to see anybody is wearing thin, and people feel the need to jump up and down to draw attention to themselves; therefore, demanding my attention,  and blathering on and on how important and vital they are while holding us all hostage to their self-import grandstanding.  

I'm liking my hobbit hole better and better. 

Weddings, Weddings, Weddings

 The post-COVID eruption of pent up wedding plans is happening.  I forgot to blog about the one we went to recently where the couple had been living together for 8 years, and got married a couple of years ago.  Granted, because of COVID, they had a smaller wedding.  Now they went and re-enacted the wedding and went all out for it.  It was a huge affair and everything was done on a grand scale.  

The vibe just was not the same.  The energy was flat.  All the fancy planning did not make up for the ho-hum attitude of everyone there.  Everything felt forced.  The energy emitted by the wedding party and guests alike was, "What is all the fuss for?  They've been living together for years and they are already married.  Can we just skip this?  It all seems so artificial like we are all playing dress up."

The only giddy people were the bride, groom, and parents.  

I'm going to give the table we were seated at credit.  Nobody was a wet blanket and if they were feeling indifferent about the event they kept it to themselves. 

Cambodian Wedding

 Today was a first.  It's a long, drawn out story how we got invited to a wedding where the groom, who is a generations deep west Sonoma County Italian-Irish Catholic from Occidental, married a first-generation immigrant girl from Cambodia.  

No.  She was not a mail order bride.  How the bride and her family got to the United States is a story all unto itself.  Cambodia was a place they escaped from.  It's not a pretty story.

The bride and groom met while they were both in high school.  They were both in band class. 

It was very interesting and educational how they blended the two cultures together.  For starters, the groom's family is your typical west-county-red-neck-cowboy-clan.  Ford pickups with gun racks and NRA stickers is par for the course with the groom's family.  They also showed up in jeans, boots, and cowboy hats.  This is NOT a slam against the groom's family.  My own family resembles them quite a bit.  I understand them completely.  

The bride's family is from Cambodia.  Many of them did not speak English.  I have to admit that I am totally ignorant of Cambodian wedding traditions.  I got schooled.  For starters, Cambodian weddings have very ornate wedding clothing.  They change their clothes several times throughout the evening.  It was very interesting to see the red necks don traditional Cambodian dress.  It was clumsy but cute.  The Cambodian wedding garb was ill-fitting as Asian men are much smaller in stature than their American counterparts.  The groom's family of white men of European decent were busting out of their Cambodian shirts - literally.  The white honkeys were good sports, but openly admitted they felt like sausages and could not wait to get into clothing that fitted more loosely was more comfortable.

Then it was the Cambodian tradition of the couple coming around to each table.  The guests have either a red or a white envelope.  There is a little game each table plays with the bride and groom before the guests hand over the envelope, which is a cash gift for the couple.  

The dancing was also interesting.  The Cambodians all dance in a circle with very distinctive flicks of their wrists and hands.  It took me NO TIME to figure it out and join right in.  At first I thought, WTF are they doing?  After I studied for a few minutes, I got the gist of it and blended in on the dance floor. 

Then there were the party favors.  The mother of the groom is also a beekeeper, so each person got a little jar of organic Sonoma County honey.  The bride's Cambodian family came around with an item I was not sure of.  I openly admitted I was completely ignorant of Cambodian wedding customs - and that I was open to being educated on their culture.  A picture of the favor is below.  I asked about the meaning of the favor as I truly wanted to understand.  A VERY Cambodian lady with eyes of somebody who was so proud to share her culture with a dumb-ass white woman like myself told me to hang it from my rear-view mirror in my car.  I will never forget the look of pride in her eyes as she told me about Cambodian wedding customs.  

For me, it was an honor to be invited to such a diverse celebration of cultures.  Nobody would ever put several-generations-deep-west-county-red-necks with first generation Cambodian immigrants, but it worked.  Kudos.  What a blend.  

Fat Albert and the Cosby Kids

 I'm a child of the 70's - teenager of the 80's.  Back in the day, Saturday morning cartoons were everything.  I recall setting my alarm clock for 7:00 AM to get downstairs before any of my siblings commandeered the television.  Funny.  Getting out of bed during the week to go to school did not elicit the joy of Saturday morning cartoons.  

Something jumped out of my subconscious memory.  There used to be a cartoon called Fat Albert.  The voice was Bill Cosby.  I don't know which causes more controversy:  The fact that there used to be a cartoon called Fat Albert that featured an obese black guy (the woke police would go nuts today); or, the fact that the cartoon was Bill Cosby's creation (a much beloved famous, black comedian who was accused of multiple accounts of sexual misconduct). 

Cracker Box Palace

I have soooo many things to blog about.  Quite frankly, I'm too tired to sort out all my emotions I'm feeling.  I have an upcoming trip to Minnesota in a couple of weeks.  It will be the first time where Dad will not be at the door to greet me when I get there.  I know I will cry.

To complicate things, my mother is being coy about spreading my dad's ashes.  The thought was to spread them at dad's deer stand up north, which was his happy place.  If you don't know what a deer stand is, I can't help you.  Just know that it is a sacred place for hunters.

Because I'm the banished daughter, I'm the last to know anything if anything at all.  I'm now getting questions from my dad's sisters as they also want to participate in spreading my dad's ashes at his hunting stand and my one aunt wanted to host a little get together at her cabin on the lake afterwards.

My mother said no.  She does not want any gatherings.

WTF?????????  Really??????  The only two remaining siblings of my father's are my dad's sisters who desperately want to participate in spreading dad's ashes??? Any my mom wants to shut them out?  

I'm devastated.  I have not had the chance to mourn my dad and having family around to acknowledge him would have been comforting and healing, at least for me.  I know my dad's sisters feel the same way. .......spread dad's ashes at his happy deer stand place....honor him with some rituals....go back to my aunt's place at her cabin on the lake to gather together and remember dad. 

I have no choice but to retreat to complete fantasy land with George Harrison's Cracker Box Palace.  I hope they are expecting me.  It's either Cracker Box Palace or the Looney Bin.  Which would be less damaging on my resume?  

Disneyland

 My sister-in-law, daughter, niece, and I just spent 5 days in Southern California.  We stayed at a hotel that I used to stay at when the kids were little 30 years ago when we would take them to Disneyland.  The occasion was my niece's graduation from high school.  She did not want a party.  She wanted the four of us to road trip it to Disneyland.  

The last time I was at Disneyland was 15 years ago???? I can't remember exactly.  There are always things you can pretty much count on making the trek to SoCal:

1.  Horrendous wrecks on I-5 (because people drive like idiots);

2.  LA traffic;

3.  Being shocked at how expensive Disneyland is;

4.  Being shocked at how crowded Disneyland is despite the exorbitant cost;

5.  Walking 10-12 miles per day.

I could not understand the number of people on scooters in the park.  How do they ride the rides?  Most of them were so obese that their asses dripped off the sides of the scooter like icing down the side of a cake.  My sister-in-law and I had a joke about how many scooters with liquid, dripping asses hanging off the sides we spotted during the day.   

These were not handicapped people.  They tended to travel in packs with other liquid, dripping asses and they would take turns riding the scooter.  Oh, I just found the below image on somebody's Twitter account.  Yup.  I nailed it.  Fat people riding on scooters don't have to wait in line and run Disneyland. 

Once you see this, you can't un-see it.

The Dream of Dad

 My father died on Christmas Day.  It's been six months.  Last night I had my first very vivid dream of my father.  I saw him and he looked like he did in his prime.  I would guess between 30-50 years old.  He was donning his hunting beard.  In my dream I knew he was dead.  I saw him coming to me and I asked him, "Dad, how are you?"

He replied in his usual cowboy understated tone of, "No complaints."

I then asked if I could give him a hug.  Dad complied.  After the hug I went on to introduce him to my daughter's sixth grade teacher as it was the end of the year and we were cleaning out her locker.  

In the same dream I was explaining to two women about the untimely death of my cousin, Karey, who died in a car accident in 1983 in rural North Dakota.  I was telling them about her death, and the hair on my arms stood straight up.  I said, "She's here."  

Again, I woke up exhausted.  I slept, but I did not rest.  My dreams had other plans. 

Summer Solstice

Yes, I recognize the summer solstice with my soul (sol) sisters.  Last night it happened here at approximately 2:00 AM Pacific Daylight Time.  Is it possible to be Christian, pagan, wicca, Mussar, simultaneously?  I'm going to say YES.  

After the ritual I went to sleep.  It was late.  I had a dream about Natalie who was a childhood friend and she died recently.  In my dream I knew she was dead, but she was standing there talking to me.  I told her about all the things that remind me of her to this day.  I spent a lot of time at Natalie's house growing up.  She was very funny and we had a lot of inside jokes that nobody but us would ever understand.  I told her I was sad that I did not get to say goodbye before she passed.  She smiled.  

Also in the dream was my cousin, Karey, who died in a car accident when I was 16 and she was 15 .  Her spirit is troubled.  Life was cut short and she's resentful and rebellious. 

Free Money - NOT

 During the COVID pandemic when everybody was freaking out about the economy our printing presses were issuing money at breakneck speed.  Politicians had no idea how, where, what, the long-term effect would be.  All politicians wanted to do was shove money in people's pockets immediately and damn the long-term consequences. 

Here's the problem.  Politicians don't see anything long-term except getting re-elected and holding onto power.  Politicians will tell the people ANYTHING to get a vote not unlike a like a guy trying to get a girl into bed.  

Here's where I'm going.  All this funny money the government issued and distributed has all come home to roost in the form of skyrocketing inflation.  I called it a long time ago.  Of course, I was called an austere, salty beach.  LOL. (exiting soapbox)

On a lighter note, yes, we are all experiencing the pangs of inflation.  Our 10% raise sounded GREAT - until inflation swallowed it up like a frog with a June bug.  A raise is only a raise if everything else remains constant or prices move lower.  What people really want is not a raise, but rather increased purchasing power.  There's a big difference.  Purchasing power is a lot harder to manipulate and control than throwing money at problems and people. 

Here's a little ditty from one of my favorite UNDER rated bands.  It's called Low-Budget.  I think we all can relate in this inflationary environment.  

 

Empty Nester

My sister and niece just left and are heading back to Minnesota.  It's the first time in 34+ years my husband and I have not been responsible for kids.  I don't count the time when daughter was away at college as we were fiscally responsible for her, and still responsible upon her return after she graduated until she settled into a job.

Now what?  Whatever shall I do with myself?  Well, for this week I'm going to Walnut Creek with M and S to see a live musical on Wednesday.  The next day I have a spa treatment scheduled with my friend, K.  The coming weekend is full of dipping around the SonoMarin Fair people watching, bringing out my inner low-class-white-trash self, and listening to music.  There are also several graduation parties to attend. 

Me?  Bored?  NEVER!

It's official:  Both kids have graduated from college debt-free, both are married, and both are now OFF the payroll :) 

Whoooooooooppppeeeeeeeeeeee     

It's also the first time in decades we are NOT responsible for ANY PETS.  Sure, we have the neighborhood cats that come around looking for better food than they get at home (yes, I spoil them), but we know who their owners are and that they are not homeless or starving.  

Please, allow me to revel in my space of not being responsible for anybody.  I'm sure it will change soon enough as elders need more care and grand kids will be born.  

 

 

 

 

Footsteps and the Camera

 Whew.  It's been a week.  My daughter is now married and on her honeymoon.  My son graduated from UC Santa Cruz and at this very minute is in his ancestral homeland of Minnesota experiencing it from a tourist point of view rather than the obligation vacation with family. 

My sister and niece are here at the house visiting.  I've mentioned several times that everybody in our house at some point has experienced the confused Native Americans wondering about trying to make sense of our modern world.

Well, it happened twice today.  My sister and I were in the kitchen cleaning up breakfast dishes when she heard footsteps and called out thinking it was her daughter.  Nothing.  The look on her face was that of pure bewilderment.  She SWORE she heard footsteps heading toward us in the kitchen.  However, nobody was there.  We were the only ones in the house.  Everybody else was across the street yakking with our neighbors.  I just kind of shrugged and said that's par for the course here.  I don't think the Native American spirits are malevolent, they are just curious and confused.  

Later that same day my husband asked me who was at the front door as our Ring camera alerted that somebody was there with "person detected".  Well, we have had a wedding and the gifts have been arriving and our camera beeps an alert when a delivery person is on our front step along with a live video feed.  Well, nobody was there in the video feed.  He kept on pestering me to check the front door as the alert of person detected kept going off.....well, again....nobody was there....not even our favorite neighborhood cats. 

Ready or Not: Here it comes

 In less than one week I will have my son graduating from UC Santa Cruz and my daughter getting married.  

My sister and her daughter arrive tomorrow from Minnesota.  They are the only two relatives who are making the trek to California for the wedding.  Many of my Minnesota relatives are farmers/ranchers and this is their super busy time.  My cousin in North Dakota made his daughter get married in December or January or he said he would not pay for it nor participate as they pretty much work 16 hour days other months of the year.  I get why my farmer/rancher relatives are not coming.  It's a 4 hour trek to the Minneapolis airport, then it's a 4 hour flight to San Francisco, then it's driving north to Sonoma County, getting a hotel room, etc., etc., etc.  It's a lot.   Still, I'm a little sad that neither one of my brothers nor my mom are not coming.  

However, my soul sisters from high school are showing up in force.  There's a reason we've all been friends since before we can remember :)

Truth:  I'm looking forward to life after the wedding.  I'm looking forward to finally having an empty nest.  Sorry if that sounds selfish.  I've been running a boarding house for my kids, their friends, and their significant others for 34 years.  

Another Truth:  We don't get a break.  We go from taking care of kids to taking care of elderly relatives.  It's all part of the life cycle. 

The Last Time

 As a society we are so focused on firsts.  For every first, there will be a last.  Do you remember the last time you saw your grandpa before he died?  Do you remember the last diaper you ever changed before your kid was potty trained?  What about the last time you drove away from a place you lived when you moved?  

Do you remember the last kiss you had with an old flame before you broke up?  

For every end there is a new beginning.

Growth in Sonoma County

 The biggest complaints these days are about growth in Sonoma County - especially from those who just moved here.   These newcomers want to close up the drawbridge - of course after they are on the side of the castle.  

It just kills me that those who are complaining about growth did not grow up in the area nor attended an area high school.  They all moved here from somewhere else.  Yet...there they are acting as though they are protectors of the environment proclaiming protection of the environment such as the one-eyed-snake, the horny-owl, and the like to keep others out.  

These people make me want to puke.  Just say it as it is.  They moved here from somewhere else, and now they don't want anybody else to move here.

The only people who have a right to be pissed off about growth are the Miwok natives of the area.  They don't give a (blank) about architecture from the 1850's fitting into our new downtown developments.  

Truth be told, the Miwoks lived along the creek where our house now resides.  Every member of our household has experienced a confused native from long ago wandering through our house trying to make sense of our modern conveniences.  They can't comprehend our lifestyle and why we have so many modern conveniences.  

There is a place along the creek where all the dogs we've ever had  stop, whine, and retreat.  I suspect it's a spot of battle ground where things did not go well for either side.  I sense there was a death of both native american warriers who were fighting about hunting rights. 

Nostalgia

 I'm feeling nostalgic as I'm freaking out about how quickly my life is passing.  It seems just yesterday that I was a teenager in the 1980's and anybody over the age of 25 was soooooooooo old and not with it.  What is pressing my emotions even more is that my baby is getting married.  It truly seems like yesterday that I was pregnant with her.  People always told me how quickly life passes.  They are right.  

Yes, it's a recurring theme in this blog as of late - my baby getting married.  However, I'm not forcing anybody to read this blog.  I don't even advertise it anywhere.  If you're here it's because you stumbled on it accidentally.  If you don't like it - leave.  I don't even allow for comments as I don't care what you think.  This blog is my cheap therapy where I process emotions.  

Now that I have my snarky menopausal comments out of the way, I'll go back to humor.  

Another thing that is freaking me out is how media stars from the 1980's are now AARP members.  Take Judge Reinhold and Sean Penn for example.  Here's a clip from my high school anthem, Fast Times at Ridgemont High.  Now, both actors are senior citizens.  WTF happened?  Time.  That's what happened.  It waits for nobody.  If the gods are gracious we grow old.  

 

Humor

 My son and my brother are at total opposite ends of politics.  My son is so liberal that he has fallen off the left coast cliff.  My older brother is so right wing that it would not shock me if he was connected to the January 6th insurgence.  

They do not see eye to eye on anything political.

Here is what is binding them together:  HUMOR.

Tell me of somebody who does not like to laugh and I will show you somebody who has something stuck in an orifice.  Remove the stick from the orifice, people.  Find humor and laugh together.  I don't care how opposite your views of the world are.  Laughter binds us together and builds bridges. 

Old White Women Gone Wild

 My exercise class consists of women of a certain age.  Youth is in our rear view mirror.  Don't take that for lack of spice and sass.  Many of the women are completely gray.  Again, don't take that for lack of spice and sass.  These women are spunky, fun, spontaneous, and would give women half their age a run for their money.  Sock it to me!

Today was 70's soul day.  You should have seen the look on the faces of the people passing by seeing us all funk out to James Brown while we did our thing in the park.  

I can't help but think of Eddie Murphy's spoofs on James Brown.  Here is one of my favorites.

The Rehersal Dinner

 It's crunch time for the wedding.  I'm so honored that my Minnesota besties are coming out for my daughter's wedding.  It's no small adventure to trek across the country.  Us 1980's gals are going to OWN the dance floor.  Not only that, my friends will be there to dry my eyes as my little girl gets married and I will be overwhelmed with emotion and be a complete mess.  

My son is graduating from UC Santa Cruz the day before his sister's wedding.  Talk about everything happening at once.  My son has had quite the educational journey as his path was the one less traveled.  My son is dyslexic.  He had to work ten times as hard as everybody else for grades.  His journey has been four steps forward, two steps backwards, three side steps, but always managing to go in the right direction.

How do we do a wedding and a graduation at once?  We certainly did not plan it this way.  The universe just doled it out to us and we had no say as COVID had an impact on both the timing of the graduation and also the wedding.  

The gods are gracious and we will be able to attend the graduation AND the wedding.  My husband and I will go down to San Jose on Thursday to spend the night and take our son and his husband out to Original Joe's, which is walking distance from the hotel we stay at.  We have something special planned for our son at dinner.  Friday we will trek over the hill to Santa Cruz and watch him walk.  After he walks we are peeling it back to Sonoma County for our daughter's rehearsal dinner.  Thankfully, the rehearsal dinner is CASUAL and it will be a taco truck serving us on the ranch.   We could show up in sweats and slippers and nobody would care. 

I was talking to a friend of mine today at exercise class.  Her son is getting married next weekend.  She was lamenting that she wanted the rehearsal dinner, which is traditionally coordinated by the groom's parents,  to have a casual vibe to it as in a food truck or the like as the venue is a ranch, but her soon-to-be-daughter-in-law insisted on some Michelin Star restaurant.  My friend is very well off financially and it's not a money issue.  She is not trying nor wanting to impress anybody with fancy restaurants for a rehearsal dinner.  Her philosophy is that people just want to eat, drink, relax, and the most importantly.....TO FEEL COMFORTABLE.......Especially with the stress of the upcoming wedding.  However, my friend is walking on egg shells as she does not want to cause any distress with her future daughter-in-law that would drive a wedge and damage relations.    

Mother of the groom wants a taco truck for the rehearsal dinner.  Bridezilla wants a fancy restaurant.  Everybody else just wants something easy and casual as they really don't care and are not emotionally invested.  The wedding party is already exhausted because most of them have traveled from far and wide just to participate in the wedding.  Bridezilla is crying because nobody is siding with her and is throwing a tantrum.  

I told my friend she can stop by anytime for a glass or two of wine.  I feel for her as she is trying so hard to keep the peace. 

The Wedding Shower

 Today was my daughter's wedding shower.  It was a very lovely affair that had a 'pretty in pink' theme.  My daughter's future mother-in-law outdid herself in putting together something so memorable.  It was very lady like and something the royals would have been proud of as the event was very dignified.  No, I was not whooping and hollering sucking on a can of beer with my bare feet while sitting on a a hay bale with a corn cob pipe in my mouth donning overalls a plaid shirt and a straw hat.  LOL

My daughter is having the wedding I never had and I'm so glad we can give it to her.  My own wedding was in Reno 35 years ago.  When we were asked if we wanted to spend $25 for a video of the wedding we declined as we did not have the $25 to spare.  Oh well.  We have pictures of us next to the velvet Elvis at the entrance to the Chapel of Love Drive Thru Weddings.  

I'm being a bit cheeky about my tacky Reno wedding - kind of.  

Now, back to 2022 and the wedding shower of today. 

It was something I will never forget watching my baby girl and her soon-to-be husband opening their gifts together.  My future son-in-law was a true sport by showing up in a pink Hawaiian shirt AND endured so much of the chick stuff with a smile on his face.  

It was a good day.  All the pre-wedding festivities are now over.  Next stop is the wedding.  Hold on and stay seated until the ride comes to a complete stop. 

Why I Got Kicked Off Nextdoor Part IV

 Ohhhhhhh boy.  The response that I would have liked to pen to this cow would have gotten me kicked off Nextdoor again.  Read the posts from this cow and then my imaginary response that only appears here.  I feel avenged that I can complain to cyberspace.  

It's no coincidence that your name is Karen.  You begged the community for a Nintendo Switch for your kid at Christmas time.  Now, a few months later you're begging of the community to give you money to send your kid to summer camp to get him off his gaming devices.  

Sounds like your problems are self-inflicted.  

Need I point out that most of your posts are a beg-a-thon?  You are constantly whining about your lack of money.  Join the club.  You are not special.  Millions of people are struggling as well.  Wait.  Billions of people are struggling.  At least you don't have to worry about bombs going off on your street and that you are lucky enough to have four walls and a roof that house you and your kid, you have a warm bed, running water, and electricity.  You also have access to food and medical assistance. 

Karen, you think you have it rough?  PUH-LEEZE.  Tie your tubes immediately.  Your genes swim at the very shallow end of the gene pool.  Do not inflict your stupidity to future generations.  My condolences to your son who had no choice in the matter.  

I'm sure you will have future beg-a-thons and Go-Fund-Me campaigns to milk the community of whatever you can.  Just do yourself a favor and at least try to disguise them from your stupidity and contradictions from previous posts. 

 

 

 

 

The Mohawk

 Back when my daughter was playing D1 softball, the mask she wore made her hair stand up on the center of her head.  Her teammates teased her that she looked like she had a Mohawk.  When my son was born, he had a tuft of hair on the top of his head that is still there to this day.  My son has also worn a spikey-blue Mohawk just because he could. 

Both of my kids have sported the Mohawk hair without really understanding their connection to it.  

What is funny is that I remember my husband's grandmother, who was into the family history, telling us about the chain of events that happened since the family arrived from England back in the 1600's and settled in upstate New York.   I distinctly remember her telling us that there was Mohawk blood in the family.  I thought that was amusing as my husband's entire family looked pretty lily white to me.  Whatever.  Family genetics are complicated and we are all pretty much a bunch of mutts.  

Where I'm going with this is that my kids are honoring their Mohican heritage and they don't even realize it.   

They are not the last of the Mohicans.  The Mohicans live on.  

p.s.  If you have not seen the Last of the Mohicans, I highly recommend you watch it.  It came out about 28 years ago or so.  It pretty much sums up how America was born. 

Gavin Newsom: Bribing the Masses

 Politics and politicians are very slimy.  Why anybody would choose such a profession must have an ego bigger than their brain.  They all make promises and think they have the solutions to problems that have been around since the dawn of time.  

The only thing that is constant and will never change is the very core of human nature.  I wish I could say that I'm impressed with homo sapiens.  We are the only species that destroys the very things that sustain life in order to accumulate inanimate objects that do not contribute to quality of life.  

Let's take California's so-called budget surplus.  Every state entity from: cities, counties, schools, universities, junior colleges, pension funds, infrastructure, health care facilities, etc., are constantly crying that they do not have enough money. Suddenly, there are BILLIONS of excess in California. Sorry, but this does not make any sense.

Governor Newsom is now planning on sending checks to households.  This smells to me of pandering and bribing so close to midterm elections.  The reasoning is rising gas prices. 

Let's think this through a minute.  With the climate crisis the last thing we should be doing is lessening the impact of rising gas prices.  People will only change when they become uncomfortable enough to pursue an alternative.  High gas prices will force people to ride public transportation, carpool, walk, and bicycle.  Staying in the zone of affordable gas prices will not prompt any changes that should have happened yesterday.  

Sure, there are the environmentalists who have led the charge on this.  However, by and large the masses will not change unless it's forced.  

 It's human nature.

Opposites: It's all Necessary

 Everything in the universe is all about balance.  For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.  I think you get the gist of what I'm referring to.  

Here's what drives me nuts.  Everybody is constantly harping about being POSITIVE constantly.  It's like we are not allowed to process anything negative - like negativity does not exist.  Here's the truth:  There is no such thing as positive if there isn't something negative to compare it to.  We need the full range of energy both positive AND negative.  It's all necessary.  

Negativity is necessary.  Sorry if I just busted your happy little effing bubble.  Stop with your commands that we are to be happy all of the time.  Humans experience the full spectrum of energy, so what's wrong with recognizing that?  

Embrace the suck.  It's OK to feel like sh** .  It's part of being human, and don't let any chirpy do-gooder make you feel worse for feeling worse. 

Busy, Busy, Busy

 I knew 2022 was going to be a super busy year.  In fact, when my husband and I toasted in the new year we each raised our glass and said to each other, "Fasten your seat belt.  It's going to be crazy for the next 12 months."

Well, it's happening.  Seat belt is fastened, but not sure if it will securely hold me in place.  LOL

My son is graduating from UC Santa Cruz the day before my daughter's wedding.  What timing!  Everything happens at once.  I guess because of COVID and all the delays with graduations, weddings, parties, reunions, etc., it's like somebody opened up the floodgates.  

Here's a fun fact about UC Santa Cruz.  Their mascot is a banana slug. The banana slug has no known predators.   Why the banana slug?  It's because it an eff-u the overemphasis on sports in college.  

MEA: Update on Misery

You all remember my assistant named MEA?  Well, I would not blame you if you did not.  I have also tried to wipe her out from my consciousness.  Her repeated claims for disability and unemployment compensation when she never really worked in the first place have left me speechless.  Like I've mentioned earlier in previous blog posts, she was a married woman with kids and decided to run off to Mexico with her English Loverboy.  

Let's face it.  All American women have fantasized about running off with Englishmen.  At least I have had that fantasy LOL.  Englishmen are just so.......irresistible!!!!  Goodness gracious,  there ought to be a law against Englishmen for being so darn HANDSOME.  I GET THE ATTRACTION. 

At any rate, back to the story at hand.  MEA ran off to Mexico to be with her English Loverboy.  I must admit there was an initial, but fleeting, twang of jealousy on my end when she left.   How romantic to run off with a fresh romance at age 50+.......    Especially with an Englishman.  Sigh.

This is where fantasy clashes with reality.

Reality:  MEA's husband was willing to work on their marriage.  He knew it was in trouble.  He also knew MEA had an English boyfriend and drove her to the San Francisco airport where he knew she was flying off to London meet with him.  MEA's husband loved her enough to let her explore what she was feeling and would there upon her return home.  

Long story short, MEA lied to her husband upon her return from frolicking with English Loverboy stating that she had gotten it out of her system and wanted to work on her marriage.  

This is about the time where MEA decides to bail on her two daughters and husband here in Sonoma County and runs to Mexico to be with English Loverboy.  Her departing words to me were pretty much of the ilk that she does not want anything from her marriage, i.e., money, items, house, or anything material that  has been accumulated during their marriage.  She just wanted OUT.  

Wow... how things change.

I got a long text from MEA the other day.  She was lamenting about how her soon-to-be-ex-husband has turned nasty in the divorce proceedings.  MEA was angry that he purchased a  house and other property prior to their split and how he was hiding money from her.   Now MEA wants her cut.  She is claiming that he purchased these properties and it was not in accordance to their divorce agreement.  The husband was granted a huge promotion from his employer right after their separation.  Now MEA wants to claim his now heightened income in the divorce as part of her alimony.  MEA is claiming that he deferred his promotion to avoid paying alimony. 

Well......MEA was hiding things from her husband as well.  It sucks when the person you're trying to efffff over gets wise and plays the same game with you.

Things are not so rosy in Mexico with 'they-lived-happily-ever-after' fallacy we have all been fed when things change abruptly and we all want to trade in our spouse for anybody who does not leave the toilet seat up and the cap off the toothpaste.   MEA and English Loverboy have had their fair share of horse manure....and then some.

Come to find out that English Loverboy could not take the stress of MEA's not-yet-compete-divorce and left their love nest in Mexico and retreated back to England.  

English Loverboy has two divorces under his belt along with five kids.  What he thought to be a cash-cow California girlfriend, MEA, has now proven to be more of a financial liability than an asset.  He bailed.  

Now MEA is all alone in Mexico.  She wants to return to California but cannot afford it.  She is also suffering from vertigo and claims she cannot work (or so she says).  It's the age-old saying of be careful what you wish for.  She got her dream lover and ran off to a foreign country.....and then it went sour in months.  

Her soon-to-be-ex-husband has moved on without her, and so have her daughters. MEA truly is alone. Somehow, I just can't feel sorry for her.  Look before you leap. 

 

 

 

 

Three Little Birds

 You all know the song by Bob Marley, I'm certain of that.  On a serious note, three little birds did show up in our garage today of all places.  We were in the kitchen making our homemade pizza when my daughter said, "Shhhhhhhhhhh.  Mom, I think there are birds in the garage."  

Well, she was correct.  There were three little birds in our garage.  How they got there is a complete mystery.  Now what?  Thankfully, social media does serve  some useful purpose.  I posted on NextDoor (through my husband's account as I have been banned LOL) that we have three little chicks.  We don't know what to do with them.  Within minutes a man and his daughter replied and said they raised chickens, ducks, and whatever comes their way as the daughter has a soft spot for birds.  

The man and his daughter arrived with all the equipment necessary to take care of abandoned chicks.  I felt good about that.  I don't know how to care for little chicks and I don't have the heart to just leave them to die (believe it or not).  

Here they are....so cute

Word Crimes

 My son showed me this Weird Al Yankovic take on a song that was popular about 10 years ago.  I love Weird Al.  I'm sure he would butcher my blog with word crimes.  I'll be the first to suck up the hard truth.  I STILL love you, Al. 

 

Mother of the Bride

 I know my BFF's are also going through this as their daughters are getting married this summer as well.  Like I mentioned earlier, we have LOTS of weddings this summer.  Just about every weekend is booked up until late September.  SSP, I know you feel me. 

I am the mother of the bride.

Let me tell you this.  It was a LOT easier when my son and his husband got married.  One would think a gay wedding would spark controversy and upset more so than a heterosexual wedding.  Perhaps because my son's wedding was hosted at my friend, M's, Victorian home and the whole vibe was that of a casual garden party.  We did everything ourselves as well from the food to the booze.   Nothing was hired out. 

Maybe gay weddings are easier because there are no expectations or traditions.  All I know is that I'm ready to kill some of the people who are invited to my daughter's wedding.  Sadly, I'm related to them.

I can't believe the number of people who want to argue and negotiate the guest list.  The invitations were very clear as to whom was included and that adding a 'plus one' was not an option.  Also, my daughter's wedding is an adult only event.  That was also made very clear on the invitation.  The snide comments we are now getting are unbelievable.  Please, just accept or decline.  I don't want a lecture on how you think your kids should be included.  I also don't want a lecture about not all relatives being invited.  The line had to be drawn.  It was very difficult for the bride and groom as there were limitations and relatives on both sides who did not receive an invitation.

My daughter has been under a lot of stress and bitchy relatives are not helping the situation.  She was the maid of honor for her best friend just this last weekend.  She planned the bachelorette party which was held in San Diego, shower, etc., all at the same time as planning her own wedding.  The bride leaned on my daughter a lot through everything as her dad is dying of cancer and we were all wondering if he would be strong enough to walk his baby girl down the aisle.  

Where I'm going with this is that my daughter's wedding invitations went out in batches because she is pretty much planning two weddings at once.  Not all of the invitations were sent on the same date.  My in-laws were comparing dates as to when they were received and gossiped about how the invitations were different.  The reason they were different was that the older generation received rsvp cards for snail mail, and the younger generation were to rsvp online.  

Holy cow.  I did not expect relatives to be comparing notes as to when they received their invitations and inventing drama about it.  Those who received their invitation on a later date are reading into it that they are on the B list.  There is no B list.  They are also all butt-hurt that their kids are not included.  Again, just accept or decline.  We understand that perhaps finding a babysitter could be an issue.  JUST DECLINE.  Trust me.  We are fine with that.  

The other thing that is frustrating is chasing down people trying to get an answer one way or another if they are attending.  Again, just accept or decline.  We are not looking for lengthy excuses.  A simple yes or no is proficient.  

Putting on a traditional wedding is no small undertaking.  Please be respectful of answering the invitation in a timely manner one way or another.  Do not attempt to argue or negotiate the guest list.  And no, if you decline the invitation a gift is not expected.  Fun fact:  even if you accept the invitation a gift is not expected.  The bride, groom, and their parents truly want you there to experience the happiest day of their lives.   

Elopement is looking better and better. 

Wedding Season :)

 It's wedding season.  We have a lot of weddings this year as the pandemic produced quite a bit of pent up demand.  My daughter's friends are all getting married as she is in that age group of mid 20's.  

We just got back from a wedding that was held in Sparks, Nevada.  Neither the bride nor groom are from the area.  The only tie to the area is the groom's mother.  Everybody else had to drive 3.5 hours from Sonoma County, where both the bride and groom are from, secure lodging, etc., for the venue that was held at the golf course where the groom's mother lives.  The golf course was out in the middle of nowhere in the high desert.  Scrounging the internet for lodging was in itself a feat as the groom's mother reserved the villas that were located next to the golf course for HER family.  There were no hotels anywhere nearby.  We had to find a VRBO or the like.  Nothing about this wedding was convenient for the guests.  Please, don't ask your guests to drive a minimum of 3.5 hours giving up an entire weekend only to skunk them as far as accommodations.  

The mother of the groom dressed exactly like the bridesmaids right down to the color, cut, and length of the dress.  Sorry, her fake tits and sloppy botox  fillers just made her look like every other Los Angeles 60 year-old woman trying to be 20.  Cheap plastic. 

There's a reason why the groom's mother is twice divorced.

And....we only thought Bridezilla applied only to brides.  

Here's what really happened.  The wedding was held at a location that was not convenient for anybody - except for the mother of the groom.  Sure, it was economical for whomever was planning it.  All they did was shove off the expense of having a wedding that could have been closer to the home of the bride and groom, and more convenient for the guests, to a cheap location where guests had to travel long distances and rack up $$$ in travel expenses to attend.......and then fork over $$$$ for a wedding gift.  

The wedding could have been a simple ceremony on a local beach followed by a couple of taco food trucks with a mariachi band.    But noooooooooooooo the mother of the groom HAD to have it at her shitty I-wanna-be-somebody-but-I'm-not golf course out in the middle of nowhere.

Yup.  Have a wedding that shoves off all the expenses off to the guests.  Sigh.  

I don't even want to touch on the invitation we received to an elopement celebration that is asking for cash only as a gift.  If it's truly an elopement, then why the crass begging for cash at a party after the fact?  Oh....we were not important enough to be invited to the actual elopement event.  The leftover guests are all invited to a brunch 4 hours north in Eureka a month after the fact.  I guess the bride and groom figured they were missing out on a bunch of gifts and cash by omitting us from the actual event and tried to make us feel better by inviting us to a brunch at a later date to make sure they could collect their take.  

Again, why drag us all the way up to Eureka?  Oh.  They really don't want us there.  They just want the cash donation. 

Black Dog

 You know your time is getting closer to the end when you walk into an old-folks assisted living center and Led Zeppelin's Black Dog is playing.  I can't make this stuff up, people.  

Kohlrabi and Rhubarb

Back when my parents were well and could travel from Minnesota to California they would bring seeds for my husband to plant.  They knew better than to give them to me as my previous post indicated that I do hospice for any and all plants and flowers - they come to me to die.  My husband has a green thumb.  To my credit I do preserve the vegetables via canning and freezing.  I'm not totally useless.  Canning vegetables with a pressure cooker is an art that I learned from my paternal grandmother.  It looks very intimidating at first, but once you do it a few times it becomes old hat.  

To this day I use my paternal grandmother's canning jars.  Yes, gramma, I honor them.

Where I'm going with this is that my parents would bring out kohlrabi seeds and also rhubarb.  Kohlrabi and rhubarb were childhood staples of mine.  I was pretty much shocked that nobody in California really knew what either was being this is such the "foodie" place.  Granted, rhubarb does not grow well in the California climate, but kohlrabi does.  Again, I was looked down upon by the snooty, local California populace as the lowly, Midwest farm girl.

Now kohlrabi and rhubarb are very en vogue.  ..and in all the yuppie foodie blogs.....and I have kick-ass, authentic recipes for both kohlrabi and rhubarb that come from the pioneer days.  Suck THAT you fake-ass pricks.  These fake-ass people did not want to give me the time of day yesterday.  ..... and now?  

They are still fake-ass pricks.