Brown Eggs Are Golden

Not so very long ago brown eggs were thrown out as they were not 'visually' desirable.  OrganiYups (the prerequisite to becoming a Bored Mom on Prozac) are demanding them.  Supply can't keep up with the demand.   For whatever reason, despite the fact that they are equal in nutrition to white eggs, the OrganiYups think that all brown eggs are "organic" and therefore superior.

Wow.  I guess the OrganiYups have more money than brains.  I'm about to cash in on this madness.   I'm going into a joint venture with a West County woman I've known for many, many years.  I've always had a passion for food, but don't want the work of running a restaurant.  Same thing with my West County friend.  My West County friend is a member of the Hick Click.  The Sonoma County Hick Click loves guns, four-wheelers, beer, hunting, and most things 'Mercan.  They believe the Armageddon is near, and have arranged to be self-sustaining in the event of a worldly catastrophe.  They have their own renewal, sustainable ranches that will provide food including livestock.  They are the multi-generational farmers and ranchers of the area.  Chances are they hate Obama and all pansy-ass "liberals" in general.  It's the Duck Dynasty of California.

My West County friend lives on a ranch.  She has all of her life.  She raises chickens for eggs.  All of a sudden the buzz words of 'organic' 'local' and 'sustainable' are all the rage with the OrganiYups.  Brown eggs are now at a premium.  She gets an extra buck a dozen because they are free-range and local.  Little do the OrganiYups know that free-range is pretty much an oxymoron as all chickens do is lie by their food bowl and eat, poop, and drink water.  They are so lazy their underside feathers wear off because they are too fat to move. 

Anyway, between the brown eggs and grain-fed-free-range-local-sustainable (insert other OrganiYup buzz words here) pork and beef my West County friend provides along with my organic-chemical-free-local-sustainable fruits and vegetables from my property we have a complete  market.  Distribution companies are knocking on West County friend's door sucking up any and all extras we might have. 

Thank you, OrganiYups, for financing our NRA political and neo-Nazi skinhead contributions. 

Aunt Gertrude

Aunt Gertrude was an old Sonoma resident.  She had her own spot at the Swiss Hotel in the square at the bar.  Everybody greeted her by name.  She was a staple there for many, many years. Aunt Gertrude lived survived the flu epidemic of the WWI era, lived through the Great Depression, and then experienced WWII.  She was a walking American history book. 

I loved Aunt Gertrude.  She had a bitey sense of humor and called everything like she saw it.  She would also make fun of just about everybody.  One of her favorite targets were the 'linen people' who began to proliferate Sonoma County when they figured out how cute, quaint, "organic" and charming Sonoma County was and began to invade. 

This brought out Aunt Gertrude's claws as she hated fake people with a passion.  She would laugh at the "organic" food hunters at the local fruit and vegetable stands who would show up on their bikes with little food baskets thinking they were getting "farm fresh, organic vegetables" from the local goodness of the earth. 

Aunt Gertrude would describe on how the commercial food trucks would arrive in Sonoma at 4:30 AM from San Francisco staging the "farm fresh organic food stand" charade.  Food stand operators laughed all the way to the bank.... dumb city slicker yuppies.... put just about anything in a pretty, straw basket display and label it as "organic" out on a country road and the linen people will pay triple the price.  It's really the same stuff you get at FoodMaxx.

Too bad Aunt Gertrude died before she could set up her own "organic" food stand.