Halloween: Princess Leah

I have not dressed up for Halloween in YEARS.  I vaguely remember Halloween before i had  gaggles of kids (but only 2 of them actually mine) to trek around the neighborhood in baby strollers and wagons.  Once past that stage it was the drama of elementary/junior high school with the classroom parties, pumpkin carving contests, parades, and the biggest drama of the holiday..........Who was trick or treating with whom.  Instead of just grabbing a pillowcase and a friend of two, like back when we were kids, trick or treating became this unnecessarily overly complicated ordeal.   It became a popularity contest and a showcase for helicopter parenting by the Bored Moms on Prozac.

Fast forward to now.  Yup, Quiet Rage really does have friends and I've been invited to a few parties tonight.  I decided to go as Princess Leah.  The hair is easy as all I have to do is a couple of side buns, and finding a long, white robe is pretty simple.  Now, let's see if I get picked up or shot by the cops for carrying a toy gun around. 

All I need now is a Wookie.

Milestone Birthday Parties

A guy I work with is having a milestone birthday.  His wife sent out 'save the date' notices a few months ago.  Really?  I've always been confused about 'save the date' notices.  What does that mean, exactly.  Is it an invitation?  No.  Is it a preview of coming attractions?  I guess.

The invitation did arrive in the mail.  I will give the birthday boy and his wife credit for that much.  Constantly registering my whereabouts and social events for the entire world to see online is not for me.

I was quickly turned off when the invitation came and it was clear that money was needed to attend.  Apparently, this event rivals a wedding in scope as it includes details as to where to book a hotel room and shuttle service to the venue.  "Call now to reserve your room for the specially negotiated price.  Ask for the (insert name) Birthday Party Room Block," the invitation instructed.

If the party was for a good, close, personal friend I would probably attend.  This is hardly the case.  This party is being hosted by The Scammers who are more than likely going to write off the entire cost of the party on their taxes being they included "business" associates.  Plus, they will bank the proceeds from the bar and cover charge and also get a few nights of a free hotel room for the block they reserved using their hotel rewards number.

Don't invite me to a for-profit business endeavor that is being disguised as a birthday party.   If I sound cynical just know that I have worked with the Scammers for 20 years.  I know their game....all too well...  I wish I could give them more credit.  Why should I pay to attend a social event?  Why should I give up my time on the weekend?  I don't pretend to be their friend.  I wish they would stop pretending they are mine.

 I did gracefully and politely decline the invitation. 

Golf and Archery

Way back in the stone age, when I was still in high school, I took golf and archery to fulfill my PE requirement.  Why did I choose golf and archery?  Let us try to remember that far back.

For starters, swimming would just mess up my make-up and hair that had I spent all morning doing.  All the swimmers had that 'brittle, green hair, chlorine' look.  Ewwwww.  Running made me sweat which refers to the reasons as to why I did not choose swimming.  Besides, I'm a ssssssslllllllooooowwwwww runner.  Hockey was a sanctioned sport in my high school, but figure skating was not.  Go figure.  Basketball broke my nails as did volleyball.  I did do gymnastics and I was ok at the balance beam.  I did not have the 4'8" 82 pound pure muscle frame like Mari Lou Retton.  There were NO dance classes to choose from.

Sigh.  Golf and archery was it.

I don't really remember much of the class other than holding our arms up over our heads so the swarms of gnats would be (temporarily) out of our faces to aim the bow and arrow or drive the golf ball.  I also vaguely remember the teacher.  I can't recall his name, but I remember him saying, "Golf is a sport for life.  There is opportunity in golf that has nothing to do with golf."

Really?  I only took the class because I would not sweat, mess up my hair, or brake a nail.

It only took 30 years, but I get now what my teacher was trying to say.  This last month I have been on tour golfing in all the industry tournaments that for years I passed on.  It's amazing what people say on the golf course.  It's amazing what they say at dinner after being outside all day and have a couple cocktails in them.  It's amazing how many people cheat when nobody thinks they are looking.  It's amazing how WHITE and MALE the sport is.  It's like a Republican rally for Jeb Bush. 

I have not quite found my life purpose for archery, but I was pretty good at it.  I suppose growing up in a hunting family I became proficient in handling all types of weapons.   Wait.  Playing darts.  Purpose found for archery.  I wonder if my old high school still offers golf and archery.  I wonder if the Bored Moms on Prozac have banned it because the bow and arrow is a DANGEROUS KILLING WEAPON.   A golf club is also a dangerous, killing weapon -- just ask Tiger Woods.

I'm a THREAT!

People get angry with me when I call them on their s***.  I thought I came with a blatant warning label across my forehead that reads, "Do not lie or mess with this one -- she will own you."

I guess some people just can't read energy.  I need to come to grips that evolution does not happen all at once but is painfully slow and gradual.  Sigh.

Anyway, I've come across another situation where I was being lied to, jerked around, and ripped off.  I do need to thank the universe for placing me in a male dominated industry where the name of the game is to f*** everybody else over for survival.  The art of doing so in a somewhat civilized manner and learning the game has served me extremely well.  I'm well versed in business and banking games.  Bring it on.

Needless to say I confronted the man who was trying to pull one over on me. He actually called me on my cell phone and got nasty.  He said I was "threatening" him.  I was doing no such thing.  All I did was catch him at his game and he could not wiggle his way out as I had compiled evidence to the contrary.  I had figured out his game.  He was livid.  The most beautiful thing was he was mostly incriminating himself and I nailed him on it.  If you have ever seen me in person you would never think of me as a "threat."  I detest violence.  I also detest liars and cheats.

My money he owed me appeared the next day.  Funny how that happens.  

I am the NICEST person in the world.  I do not go around looking for people to roast -- you all come to me.  If I lash out and call you on your s*** it's because you deserve it.   'Nuff said

Overpopulation and Global Warming

I'm no expert on global warming.  I'm no expert on overpopulation other than the fact the humans, as a species, are totally overrated.  As the world population continues to swell, each and every person will drain precious natural resources that are diminishing by the hour in conjunction with fighting for economic survival. 

Let's face it.  Most humans are selfish, psycho, pains-in-the-ass. 

Which brings me to global warming.  I think we are being fed the 'lite' version of what's really happening.  If we really knew the escalating impacts of our weather patterns it would cause wide spread panic and the global melt down of governments and markets.  There goes your retirement 401(k). 

Think about it.  Weather extremes are happening in greater variances and in greater frequency.  Not so very long ago a winter coat and gloves were a necessity in Sonoma County.  My favorite winter coat has not been worn for 4 years now.  It just simply has not been cold enough.  The heat factor is now driving people from the LA area away.  What?  People moving away from San Diego and LA, California's poster child for weather envy, because it's too hot? 

Something is going on that we are not being told the complete truth about.  Of course it's in the Republicans best interests to deny global warming.  It would destroy their short-sighted version of how much money they can control and would require a new way of thinking.  Nobody likes it when their ideals are challenged -- even if it's right.

OK.  So global warming is real and we are all in for a rude awakening.  Even so, just what do we do with all the PEOPLE? 

No gifts, please

That's what the birthday party invitation said..... no gifts, please...and then went on stating that your presence is your present. 

OK.  I get that.  I respect what the host wanted.  I responded to the invitation in a timely manner and showed up as I said I would and did not claim some lame excuse after I accepted the invitation to try to get out of the social commitment I had just made.  Believe me, I could have easily blown off this party.  I thought about a simple, home-made gift but then out of respect for the wording on the invitation decided against it. 

I arrive at the party to a HUGE table filled with gifts.  Wait.  Didn't the invitation state "no gifts, please."?  So, if that was truly the intention why have a table set up with a mountain of gifts on it?  Why didn't the host scuttle the "unexpected" gifts to a bedroom and shut the door so other guests, who actually followed the hosts wording on the invitation and were not in on the 'gee, we said no gifts on the invitation but we really didn't mean it' , making me feel like a complete cheap ass? 

Say what you mean and mean what you say.  I don't engage in mind or word games.  Lay it on the line. 

I made my quick rounds hugging the host family and thanked them for including me on their "celebration" and left.  I'm done with them. 

Pioneer Cemetery: Golf Course - Gated Community

Yesterday I was in the Sierra Nevada  Foothills at another industry lah-ti-dah golf tournament.  The prizes were a brand new Mercedes-Benz (all decked out with bells and whistles of course) for a hole in one along with other over-the-top raffle prizes given away at dinner.  The venue was like something out of the comedy movie Caddy Shack -- a country club snob-a-torioum in a gated, private community. 

Let's be honest.  I suck at golf.  I'm more interested in driving the cart, being outdoors, and socializing.  With that being said, I was basically the 'caddy' for our foursome as I can't drive the ball to save my life, but I'm an amazing putter.  All those years of miniature golf aiming for the clown's mouth finally found purpose. 

While the others were teeing off driving the ball down the fairway I had time to look around the course and see the perfectly manicured, HUGE, stately homes.  The homes were beautiful I have to admit.  However, I'm so over wanting to actually own one.  All I see is maintenance, expense, hassle and pressure to keep up a certain income level.  For what?  To impress whom?  (sigh) My eyes then wandered off to the fringes of the golf course where I spotted what I thought were tombstones.  I had to go check it out. 

I trekked up the steep, grassy hill effortlessly off the beaten path like I was being pulled by an invisible rope that was attached to my chest.  There it was.  A pioneer family cemetery.  I was immediately drawn to a tombstone that bared the name of a woman who died at age 44 in 1876.  Next to her were her infant children she had lost to god-only-knows-what back then.  One lived one day (or was a stillborn) and the other died at 3 months.  I picked up such a sense of loss, sadness and sacrifice (but yet intense bravery and strength) at that cemetery as I looked around at the other tombstones.  I could almost tangibly feel their life stories coming up through the ground.  They were American Pioneers who braved crossing the continent and the Sierra Nevada range looking for opportunity.  Most born in New York and Illinois.  I got the weird sense that the dead pioneers were shocked that such grandiose luxury now existed where they had to scratch survival out of the dirt without modern amenities.  I got the sense that they are freaked about how could all of this ornate development could exist where they carved out a homestead among the cruel harshness of nature. 

Just as I was really starting to get a deeper read on the energy being emitted from the pioneer cemetery one of my golf group was yelling at me saying, "Get your ass down here.  What are you looking at up there?  The group in back of us is up our ass so we need to speed up play." 

I scuttled down the hill and into the golf cart as quickly as I could.  I could not shake off what I just experienced.  I could not mention it to anybody in my group as they would dump me in the next available sand trap and leave me for dead being the freak that I am. 

Anyway, this was the sign I was warned with going off the beaten path to check out the pioneer cemetery.  I'm still not sure if the sign was meant to warn me against rattlesnakes, the people I was golfing with, or those who reside in the gated community. 

Rebel Without a Cause: Hangar

I won't go into the intimate details of the contractor I once worked with who was involved in the car accident that killed James Dean.  He received hate mail for decades and had a target on his back.  Not a fun way to go through life.  Like the accident wasn't shitty enough. 

This is about my own issue of being a 'rebel without a cause' and taking the brave stance of hanging a hangar inside a hotel room on the sprinkler system where it says NOT TO!!!!  OMG!!!!  Just where are the cops when you need them?  somebody STOP ME

Text Message Breakup

(sigh) Sadly, texting is such a lame way to end a relationship.  Those who do so should be flogged for social crimes and not allowed to co-mingle in polite society.  It's the spineless cowards' way out.  Think about it.  There was enough intimacy in the relationship for sex to happen, but can't look the person in the eye upon ending things?  Disgraceful.

For those of you who have been on the receiving end of a text message breakup, I'm sorry you had to experience the lowest of the low in the relationship pool.  You have hit rock bottom.  Your relationship prospects can't get any worse and there is no where to go but up.  Trust me. 

Maybe I can make muster a weak laugh out of you while you're licking your wounds from such crass behavior from somebody you had feelings for and thought had evolved beyond the emotional state of a snail. 

Roseburg, Oreson: President Obama

If you would have asked me 3 days ago if I was going to suddenly be in Roseburg, Oregon entangled in President Obama's motorcade security I would have said that you were out of your mind...but suddenly there I was...  I had 4 hours notice before making the trek north.  For those of you just tuning in (like I actually have any readers) Roseburg, Oregon is the latest horror scene of kids with guns committing mass murder at a school. 

Once there with traffic halted and all off/on exits to I-5 blocked with Oregon State police, I had plenty of time to observe the populace along with the protesters and to sit still to *really* take in the energy of the area and what was going on around me.  This is what came across to me.  I can't say that I'm right or wrong, but it's what I felt for whatever that's worth.  Here goes. 

Our knee-jerk reaction is to blame guns.  Of course, that's the obvious place fingers are pointed.  I can't entirely dismiss the argument against gun control.   Everybody is screaming for background checks prior to buying a gun.  Really?  We are all nuts.  Where do we draw the line? 

I think the root of the problem runs deeper than the surface level gun control argument.  Upon entering the areal of Roseburg, Oregon I noticed the proliferation of "Jesus Saves" billboards along with other overly preachy and self-righteous billboards masquarading as being Christian when it smacked of intense dogma.  God (or Jesus if you will) save you if you did not take in their doctrine hook, line, and sinker.  How dare anybody question anything?  It's in the BIBLE.  We will BEAT this belief system into you whether you LIKE IT OR NOT.  Next to the Jesus billboard and the church was the truck stop with the big, neon lights advertising the ADULT SHOPPE and the meth-head on the corner screaming at cars passing by.  Yeah... something is just a bit off kilter, here. 

Where was a young person to go when he questioned what was being fed his belief system?  Where was any room for diversity?  Why do you think the young gunman asked if the student was a Christian prior to gunning them down?  Does anybody else out there sense what's really going on when you peel away the layers of the onion?  What if you did not quite fit into the box that Roseburg, Oregon prescribed to you?  What if those who where up on their preachy Christian pedestal were molesting kids at Sunday School and running a kiddie porn ring? 

Stranger things have happened.  Just ask Jared the pedophile Subway spokesperson.  Weird shit happens everywhere.  All the time.  The shooting was just the tip of the iceberg.  There is so much sub verged.  It's so easy and simple to blame the surface issue of guns.  Yes, guns are a problem.  I'm not saying that it's not.  There is just so much more to this. 

Here we go again...  Pumped Up Kicks

A Hair Style So Hot

....that MEN copy my style.  Yup.  I was one of the first to revive the 'bun' hairstyle.  I should be flattered that it took off and is copied by chicks and dudes alike.  I see my hair everywhere now.  I always get asked, "how do you make your hair like that?"

My hair be like...

And even dudes like my hair... and they be like..

Not bad being a trend setter for a somebody over 40. 

Bitch Slapped

Some people just need to be bitch slapped.  HARD.  and.... odds are the driver of this vehicle is male.  Why else would he be trying to fit such a large thing into a small space?  Trying to overcompensate for something lacking?  He wishes his could "fill" the space like this.  Oh well, if this fulfills his need to overcompensate for his small penis then so be it. 

St. Regis San Francisco

I've been in SF for the past few days for my industry's annual national convention.  My industry likes to do things first class.  Going to dinner for a group of 8-12 and having the bill come to $8,000 is nothing for them.  How do I know this?  I sign the check.

Which brings me to the St. Regis Hotel in San Francisco.  My work never puts me up in a slum when I need to spend the night somewhere.  I should be thankful.  However, it get a little riduculous at the St. Regis.  I have my own private butler.  I'm not allowed to iron my own clothing or retrieve my own ice.  WTF?  Really?  Are you KIDDING me?

Heaven forbid if I should run out of toilet paper.  Private BUTT-ler.

Pot Lounge - Not a Bathroom: Santee Sioux Weed Oasis

OMG!!!!!  LOOPER!!!!!  They STOLE our idea!  We had it all planned out, but the Santee Sioux tribe beat us to the punch.  They were eavesdropping on OUR ideas!  Oh yeah, we thought of this first.  What kind of homies do that to one another?   Now, dear Looper, just *how* are they going to get their stash of hash?  Mendocino and the Emerald Triangle get a cut of the action.  We are not out of this game yet. 

The Light

I've been at my job for going on 30 years.  My office is in a historical building that I would not trade for anything despite the usual quirks old buildings have.  The building manager has been here longer than myself, believe it or not.  She has seen me go through life and watched my kids grow up.  Her office is next to mine and the walls are not exactly sound proof.  I know her routine and can 'hear' scuffles, ringing phones, etc., through the walls. 

She is retiring today.

Just moments ago I heard her familiar pattern of sounds as she readied herself to go home for the evening.  I heard the light switch 'click' off and the squeaky office door close for the last time.  I could not even muster myself to go out and give her a hug.  I'm sitting here crying.  I don't know why.