I'm going to take you waaaaaaay, back.....back into time....when Northern Girls toilet paper posters were a thing of art. I had all of them lined up in my faux bedroom upstairs on the pony wall.
I just remember how soft and pretty they looked and how I wanted to BE them. I was maybe 7 or 8 years old at the time.
Do you remember any of this???
There are so many reasons I love this song. For starters, it takes me back to my high school years. I had a crush on a guy named Byron (who was dating a friend of mine) and he liked this song as well. I never did anything to cross the line with Byron and my friend, so my little secret crush remained that - just a secret little crush that did not go anywhere.
Innocent.
Then there is the choreography in this video. I LOVE IT. It's so classic Michael.
Then there is the larger social message to kids out there. Don't get involved with gangs.
Then there is Michael Jackson in his prime along with his signature dance moves.
Then there is the guitar solo featuring Eddie Van Halen.
Then there is me at dance class still dancing to this song with all the signature choreography. LOL
If you are from the WWII generation or had any interactions with veterans and survivors thereof, you know what I'm talking about.
Shit on a shingle.
What is shit on a shingle? The five-words-or-less answer is chipped beef on toast. It was a staple on the American dinner table from WWII to the 1970's.
What's in it? Well, it's dried beef (the kind you get in a jar) sliced very thinly mixed with a roux with minimal seasonings. It's served over toast and with a green vegetable on the side.
What? You did not know that dried beef came in a jar? Of course not, you pampered millennial who gets $5.00 coffee drinks daily, orders Uber Eats, and then bitches that you don't have any money to pay your obligations.
My contributions to Planned Parenthood are going unheeded. My grand niece (by marriage) is knocked up again by no "hables Englais" border jumpers who want to plant their seed (literally) to have their anchor baby in the United States so they do not get deported back to Mexico or whatever shit hole country they are trying to run from.
Sigh.
Here's what pisses me off. Most of the rush from the border is coming from Honduras, Guatemala, etc., but they bypass next door neighbor Mexico and rush to the borders of the U.S.A.
Why?
Why is not Mexico absorbing the mass exodus of refugees? Mexico is the next bordering country. Why do they get to skip across Mexico and try for direct entry into the US?
Because Mexico sucks? Mexico does not want them and are punting to us?
Yup. Central American refugees are picking and choosing which countries they want to suck from and claim asylum . They know Mexico does not want them, so they will try for us here in the US as we are suckers and will give them more than what Mexico would ever think to give them.
Border skipping. Mexico is happy as they don't want them, and are more than happy to pawn them off on us. .,
Here's a clue to all of you pumping out babies like a pez dispenser. If you can't feed your baby, then don't have a baby. And don't think maybe, if you can't feed your baby. We collectively donate millions in birth control via Planned Parenthood so you don't have to have children you can't provide for. Please beg their assistance. It's free.
Wrap it. Control it. Plan it. Even the rhythm method is better than no method.
None of this would be an issues otherwise.
Ohhhhhhhhhhh...... I've offended the Latino machismo. Just whack off a few more times and it will all be good. I promise. Your extra sperm has already done enough damage.
No, I will not be winning the Nobel Peace Prize for my criticism of over populating humans beyond what the environment can handle. (we are over populated) Get yourselves fixed or limit your offspring. The environment and all of us thank you.
I've sensed a disturbance in the force. Millions of angry do-gooder coastal liberal elites who live in gated communities in their mansions in Marin driving their Tesla (with equality for all stickers) and kids going to private schools decrying any and all development for the sake of the environment (code for we do not want any low income housing anywhere near us) want to hunt me down and kill me.
Whatever.
