Monday, September 26, 2016

1st Presidential Debate

Nobody is going to like this as I will not support either egotistical robot that has been propped up front of cameras telling us that we HAVE to choose one or the other.

We do have a choice.  Unfortunately, it's been squelched by the sham of a democratic process Hillary claims she loves so much and the press they try to manipulate.  Hillary said tonight ON CAMERA she respects the will of the American people??????  Bullshit.  Tell me WHY the democrats fucked over Bernie. Was he  not the will of the American people?  Of course he was..  It just was not to Hillary's selfish plan.  So they fucked him over.  Why should we trust the democrats? 

Hillary.  You "claim" you are for middle class America.  Another bullshit bullet point your campaign advisors told you to address with a manufactured sniff and tear for the cameras to gain points in the latest political poll.

Wow.  You really think we are dumb.

I'm not letting He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named off the hook, either.  Every word out of his mouth was of a selfish viewpoint.  He has been there.  done that.  bragging about it.  His is bigger.  He even said his first priority was putting himself and his family FIRST.  So much for trickle down economics.   I have a problem with somebody who won't disclose his tax returns.  He never ONCE admitted he made a bad decision.  I will at least give Hillary that.

He blabs and threatens about other countries not paying their fair share of taxes for us protecting them and that's why we are broke.  Let's start with HIM.  I have ZERO respect for somebody who does not pay taxes into the country he claims he wants to raise from the ashes and hides behind the stupid and lame excuse that he is being audited by the IRS.  He also brags about taking advantage of business laws and bankruptcy laws.  If he were so ethical and cared he would not have done so.

I also have reservations about somebody who thinks he can bully and lambast his will over others.  So, let's throw it back into Trump's face.  Now he suddenly cares after 30 years about paying his fair share of taxes and not treating people like complete shit in order to advance himself?  Impress me.  Voluntarily pay back taxes and disclose tax returns.  Put your money where your mouth is.  Oh, there really is no money....just beautiful people and wonderful parties and traveling and talking and bullshit.  He has a business venture here, there, and everywhere.  He also has kids younger than his grandchildren.  Whoze Yo Daddy????  Oh yes, disposable wives.  I suppose he would hate it if all the ex wives got together and wrote a book about how bad he really was in bed and he's a 'never hard.'

My take on tonight's debate?  Gary Johnson won.  And he was not even invited to debate. Still, if I could ask one question and only one question it would be, "If Jesus Christ Himself could not save humanity, what makes you think that you can?"



Sunday, September 25, 2016

The Wedding RSVP

I received a wedding invitation for a 'destination wedding' on the opposite coast.  I have only met the bride and groom once (I am a casual friend of the bride's mother).  The wedding invitation was, shall we say, non-traditional and wanted the RSVP online along with instructions on how to contribute to the gypsy van motor home the couple wishes the wedding guests to purchase for them.  If the motor home option was not something the guests wanted to do, they requested cash and gift cards only as their small apartment can't accommodate "stuff."

Somewhat insulted that the bride and groom, to whom I don't have any attachment and could not identify me in a police line up now demanding cash, I did resist the temptation to reply with snark and dog shit.  I did send a hand written card sincerely wishing them well, sending our regrets, and a check.  I did this for no other reason than out of respect for the bride's mother as she is a lovely lady.

I have now received a mass produced 'nagging email' saying that I have yet to RSVP to the wedding.  I did.  I sent a personalized response via US Post along with their wish for cash.

It then dawned on me that perhaps they did not receive my card/check.  I emailed the bride asking her if she received my card as it enclosed a check and my hand-written regrets.  If not, perhaps I should put a stop payment on the check and reissue another one.  I have yet to hear from the bride and it's been a few days.  I have no other way to get a hold of the bride except through their wedding website and email address.  Do I approach the mother?  Should I put a stop payment on the check and drop the matter?

I'm trying to act in a dignified matter despite the crude, obvious, impersonal, and opportunistic on-line cash grab of near strangers.  I suppose my crime is trying to make a personal connection to an impersonal invitation/request for money.  Guilty. 

Filipino Twat Trap

I don't like using negative words that describe parts of the female body.  I loathe the word "cunt" and also "twat" and whatever else you can think of.  Sure.  I will throw the "F" bomb out there, but I very RARELY ever use the other words I just typed.  I don't know why.  I just don't like them as they are derogatory and are reserved for instances where I feel extreme dislike for somebody/something. 

I mentioned in one of my posts not too long ago how I was saving a rant involving Filipino women who LOVE trapping white guys into fatherhood and/or marriage.  Stupid guys.  Don't they know about the Filipino Twat Trap?  Didn't they read about it in Penthouse magazine?  There are only three outcomes (no pun intended) when a guy has more than the standard, arranged prostitute sex with with a Filipino woman.
1.  A disease;
2.  Preganancy;
3.  Both.

I watch this from the sidelines, but I have never witnessed such manipulative, lying, conspiring tactics Filipino women use to trap a white guy.  They make  women of other nationalities look uber tame in comparison.  These Filipino women will stop at NOTHING to get their claws into the white guy's bank account and creating an anchor baby.   These women don't care if it means the guys abandoning their wives and other children.  They will tear the families apart and create HATE for the ex wives and the kids he may have had with them.  All the Filipino Twat Trap sees is what she thinks is the American dream and will be the kinky sex slut the white guy wants to seal the deal. 

Careful now.  It takes two to tango.  Filipino Twat Trap has already gotten pregnant and made plans to marry White Guy.  It will be a little while before Filipino Twat Trap figures out she married somebody who is not what she thought.  More than likely he's financially leveraged.  White guy is now fucked.  Literally. 

Oh well, I guess in the big scheme of things they deserve each other. 




Friday, September 23, 2016

The Death of Mr. Happy

We moved into our house 19 years ago.  Before that, we lived in Novato, northwest Santa Rosa, and various parts of Petaluma.  Whatever. 

When we moved into the house where currently live 19 years ago, it was notably an "older, established" neighborhood (read:  boring old snobs).  OK.  I can deal with that. 

The problem was that they could not deal with us.  Enter Mr. Happy.  Mr. Happy lived behind us.  Mr. Happy was an older gentlemen obviously set in his ways.  He drove around in a white pick-up with a scowl on his face. 

Sorry, but there were signs of actual life at our house.  Kids' toys, laughter, water balloons, trampolines, dogs, cats, music, kids running around, etc.  None of it happened after 8:00 PM which is when bitcy=hy momma (me) called everybody in and it was quiet time.  I bribed them in with homemade popcorn.  I do have some respect for neighbors. 

What has this got to do with Mr. Happy???  I'm getting to that. 

When my son was younger he had a paintball gun as did all of his friends.  Our house was the natural magnet for congregating as we had tons of space and loads of privacy for them to do their thing.  OK.  So I had a bunch of boys in their early teens with paintball guns in my back yard.  They were having a blast.  Literally.

One paintball smacked the fence where Mr. Happy lived (behind us).  He yelled out some nasty comment.  Hey, I'm all for nasty comments.  Bring the comments ON, but BRING THEM TO MY FACE.  The paintball did not even explode on his side of the fence.  It was on OUR side.  More reason to BRING IT TO MY FACE.

Well, eventually we made peace with Mr. Happy.  He brought it to my face.  I'm OK with that.  At least he was man enough to do so.  Dispute settled.  All is well.  Peace out, Mr. Happy.  He eventually came around for evening cocktails or  to bullshit in the front yard. 

Mr. Happy stopped coming around.  I found out that he died. :( 

Thursday, September 22, 2016

I'm the Target

OMG.  I can't make this stuff up, people.  I'm being accused of screwing a business owner (let's just call him Asswipe) out of $180,000.  Here's the reality.  Asswipe did it to himself and is now looking for somebody else to blame.

Backstory:  Asswipe had a nice career working for Employer X.  Of course!!!  Employer X is getting RICH and not giving Asswipe his fair share!!   Asswipe sez Fuck Employer X!!!  Never mind that Asswipe was being paid premium wages and benefits for himself and his dependents and also had a company vehicle that we all knew he drove to his kids to soccer games with -- and their little pals (so against the insurance policy).  All those little favors slid for a while.  However, that's beside the point.  Asswipe wanted MORE and thought he deserved it.  Employer X gave him all he could - knowing full on that he was nothing more than a spoiled, temper-proned Ommpa Loompa with no real business clue.  Buh-BUY

So, Asswipe decides to go into business for himself.  Great.  I'm on the employer end of things. Asswipe calls me.  He needs an employer bond.  I tell him up front what the deal is with the industry and how he does not meet the criteria.  He does not like my answer and thinks he can go shopping for different answers elsewhere.  Great.  Go across the bay.  They will tell you the same thing.  In fact, the last words he spoke to me were, "you're not the queen of everything."

Wanna bet?????  In my industry I AM the Queen of Everything and if you're going to mess with me and get hostile with me you better damn sure know what you're doing or I will own you.  You will be chewing on your own words you wish you never uttered.  BAM!!!!!

Lo and behold the audit happens and Asswipe owes the industry  $180,000.  Of course he is pissed and wants to blame somebody and I'm the target.  I've been copied on the emails between Asswipe and my attorney.  He tried to cheat the system and got caught.  Boo-hoo .  I've got nothing to say.  How am I to blame if he tried to run employees through the company payroll and did not abide by legal payroll requirements?

 Yet somehow..... the guilty never want to own their own shit.   I am always to blame (so they think) A repeated pattern in my lifetime.   I guess I really am Karma's Assistant. 


Tuesday, September 20, 2016

2016 Election

No matter what we are effed with this coming election.  For starters any responsible, fair person running for office is quickly killed by the piranhas.  A third party choice?  Surely you jest.  We can't even get a fair shot with Bernie as so-called Democrats tried to squelch him because the Ice Queen thinks she's OWED another term in the White House.

Yup.  She thinks she is OWED another shot at the presidency.  I'm sick of the Clinton-Bush dynasty.  They have had their way for 30 years.  Who do you *really* think was the president while Billy Boy was getting his prostate 'cleansed' by Monica and countless other young female interns?  At least I can give Hillary credit for not thinking with her dick.  It does not count for much credit.

Our vote?????  Does it really matter???  We have a choice of crazy or corrupt.  Neither is going to end well.

The Democratic Party really shot themselves in the foot by trying to silence Bernie.  We are soured to the point of voting for he-who-shall-not-be-named because of the betrayal of the democratic process. That's the one thing he's got going for him despite his obvious and  numerous faults.  He's never been caught trying to obstruct the voice and will of the American people.  He's an asshole.  At least he's up front about it and not preaching to the cameras with glasses off and looking concerned pretending he cares about us.

Suck on that for a while, democrats.  You have a LOT of damage control to think about.

Friday, September 16, 2016

Harvest Moon - Super Moon

Take a look at that. Tonight is the harvest moon and it will be especially full and bright.  No wonder I'm an emotional train wreck.  I'll spare you the warbly, tinny, slightly out of tune song titled "harvest moon" by Niel Young.  I almost posted it.  Ok.  I'm a FAN.  There I said it. 

I've always thought full moons were beautiful and mysterious.  Go out an enjoy, ya'all, ya'all.  I will be back to my bitchy self tomorrow ranting about how Filipino women *love* getting their hooks into white guys (thinking white guys have money -- many of them don't despite their fancy clothes/cars) and trapping them into marriage. 

Monday, September 12, 2016

Morton County North Dakota: Homies Acting Up (again)

Here be my homies acting up (again) as they are protesting the oil pipeline in North Dakota.  The Standing Rock Sioux are a tad west from the Wahpeton Sioux but the message is the same.  I guess the moral of the story is that archeological artifacts have been found and it's 'sacred ground.'   Duh.  This is news????  I have a collection of arrow heads and native pottery I found while walking around the grounds in the spring time from back in the 1970's.  I did not know any different and picked it up and saved it.  My uncle has a shed full of stuff that he has found over the years.  Still, even as a kid I had a sense that what I was finding was special and there was a story behind every arrowhead that I found.
OK.. so they are protesting the pipeline.  They have that right.  However, how many of them drove cars to get to the protest site and collaborated their group efforts on the iPhone or internet?  Somehow, I don't think they used smoke signals.  Do they live in teepees without running water, electricity, or centralized heating in a sub-zero Dakota Prairie January?  Just a question.  This is no slam to the natives.  It's just a general hypocrisy I notice with all "green" protesters regardless of ethnicity.  The Urban Greenies are still, by FAR, the worst. 


Thursday, September 8, 2016

The Shit-Fart = Shart

MRH, this one is for you!!!  Some of the biggest belly laughs complete with wine coming out of my nose have been from the things you say.   It's your fault my stomach hurts the next day from laughing so hard. 

When you educated me on the shit-fart or, shall we say, shart, was one of those times I laughed so hard I think I peed my pants.  Oh yes, you had a complete description that gave me a visual that I tried to forget but can't.  It's like an accident on the freeway.  You can't help but look and you never forget it.  The shart.  It's one of everybody's dirty little secrets - literally. 

I had an appointment yesterday in Novato.  When I pulled into the parking lot -- BAM!!  There it was.  Peter Shardt.  I bet he's a dirty dick.  I can't make this stuff up, people. 

Tuesday, September 6, 2016

Really dumb things that piss me off

I know that this entire blog is dedicated to stupid things that piss me off, but here is a list of the most trivial things that push my buttons (like I need any help).  Here goes:

1.  Cup holders in cars that can't hold a cup.  No, don't put Kleenex, gum wrappers, whatever, in the cupholder.  That's where MY DRINK GOES.  It's not a waste receptical

2.  Surveys.  Just about every transaction now wants a "customer experience servey".  Fuck off.  I don't need anything else to do -- especially to do your job FOR you pro bono.  If you feel the need to ask you already know you're messing up.  Don't waste my time.  Get out of your ivory tower and down in the trenches.

3.  Urban Greenies.  They all want the comforts of luxury living with all the modern amenities, but think that growing parsley on their kitchen window sill makes them a farmer and 'living green.'   You can't have your cake and eat it, too.  Go live out in Alaska off the grid.  News flash - there is not a Starbucks nor a Whole Foods within a 1,000 mile radius.  Oh, and your cell phone/computer will not work so posting feel-good promo pics pumping your own self-righteous ego is a waste of time.

4.  Politicians.  Need I say more?

5.  People who don't pick up their dog's shit.

6.  People who run red lights because THEIR time is more important than YOURS.

7.  Nosy acquaintances who deem themselves experts on your life while their own is up in flames.

8.  Tab suckers.  You know.  When you go out in a group and divide up the final tab equally.  There are always the ones in the group who order the most expensive items on the menu while the others order mid range.  When the final bill arrives and it's split equally, the tab suckers take more than they give and pay less than their fair share.

9.  Telephone or door-to-door solicitors.  I'm home minding my own business.  Stop bothering me.  Don't you DARE interrupt my bath time complete with Michael Jackson on Pandora and a glass of wine.  Maybe I should greet them naked.  That would certainly scare them away.

10.  Relatives.  In laws or out laws???????

Sunday, September 4, 2016

CVS = Completely Valuless Shit

Ya'all know what CVS is?  You know, the drugstore that is on every corner in the United States (at least out west).  It used to be Bill's Drugs, then Longs, then something else that I can't remember, and now it's CVS. 

I know it may be hard for you to believe, but I am VERY polite to people working with the public.  I never talk down to wait staff, cashiers, etc.  It takes a LOT to rattle my cage as my patience level is high in the public realm.  That's why I have this bitchy blog -- to let off steam -- it does not go public.

Yesterday was the exception.

A relative of mine had knee replacement surgery.  Being now I am an empty nester with empty bedrooms and no stairs, my house is the natural place to recover, rehabilitate, and heal.  OK.  Nurse Quiet Rage.  I can do that. 

Part of taking care of somebody post surgery is picking up their prescriptions.  OK.  I can also do that.  Just let me know when they are ready to be picked up and where.  Easy, right??? 

Nope.

I stopped by the local CVS to pick up the prescription for my sister-in-law after she told me it was ready to be picked up at the location nearest me (as there are thousands of CVS drugstores).  I notice there are two windows:  One for pick-up and one for drop-off.  I'm picking up a prescription, so I go to the pick-up window and wait my turn.  When I got to the counter I told the young man that I was there to pick up a prescription on behalf my my sister-in-law.  He taps the information in the computer.  He then says to me, "Sorry, but the prescription is being held up due to an authorization from the insurance company."

Ok.  Fine.  I step out of the line and call my sister-in-law.  I said the prescription was not ready due to insurance authorization.  She was confused and surprised by that as well as she had received confirmation that it was ready, but I went home as I had groceries to put away.  No sooner did I get home my sister-in-law told me that the prescription was ready and waiting after all, and that I was to go to the DROP OFF window to PICK it UP. 

What????  I was just there.  You mean to tell me that I was to go to the 'drop off' window to 'pick up' a prescription, and that the moron at the pick up window had no clue that it was ready and waiting five feet away from him?  Ridiculous.  I was angry.  I went back and went to the DROP OFF window with steam coming out my ears.  I pointed to the large DROP OFF sign above my head and said that I was just here 15 minutes ago to PICK UP a prescription, and the boob at the 'pick up' window five feet away had no clue that it had been filled and ready - in fact told me that it was pending an insurance hold.  "Oh, you're supposed to go the drop off window to pick up."

Really???  why don't they change their signs instead of wasting my time and energy?  The young woman behind the counter trying to explain their messed up system and she said, "You're not listening to me." 

That's when I lost it and told her and the idiot working the pick up window that I did not need a lecture. 

How do companies stay in business with employees that stupid??????????